A Penny for Your Thoughts
by Me And Not You 1001
Summary: Aria had what you could say was a terrible childhood. When she picks up two hitchhikers claiming to be Aragorn and Legolas from Middle Earth and somehow gets them home but brings herself too, she's going to have to take herself and all of the Thoughts in her head on an adventure of a lifetime. Can the Fellowship heal her and still succeed in their quest? Book and movie
1. Chapter 1 Aria

A Penny for Your Thoughts

Chapter 1 Aria

Aria stared at the strange men sitting across from her at the breakfast table, her face expressionless. They wolfed down the waffles she'd given them, then the oatmeal, then the frosted flakes, and were now working on the eggs, toast, and bacon. The dark-haired one was good looking, but it was the blonde one she couldn't keep her eyes off of. He was like supermodel-angel perfect. Of course he was an elf. She shook her head and looked down at her hot chocolate.

 _That's right,_ a voice in her head told her. _You see them, his ears are pointed, he is an elf._

 _Yeah, well after what you've been through,_ a different voice answered, _I wouldn't be surprised if you were seeing things._

 _We are of the same mind, Genius,_ the first voice retorted, _we went through the same thing._

 _I'm still the sanity of the outfit._

 _Well, if you're the sanity, then we're in trouble, because you're talking to yourself._

 _SHUT UP! Both of you!_ Aria's command voice commanded. _We don't have time for your arguing now. We have to find out what these guys are doing here and what they want._

 _They look like Aragorn and Legolas._ The first voice, Insane Thinking, answered.

 _Thank you, Captain Obvious!_ Aria's sanity, or Sane Thinking, answered to that. _None of us noticed. The ears weren't obvious at all!_

 _Okay, don't give me any of your crap! I felt like I had to say it since no one else was gonna!_

 _I would have._ Answered a new voice, Aria's Enlightening Thinking.

"Thank you." Aria looked up at the sound of the dark-haired man's voice, blocking out the individual thought types as they argued with each other. "You have been most gracious and kind to us."

"Oh," Aria started, surprised, "It was nothing."

 _Yeah, it was something._ Aria's Negative Thinking muttered quietly.

 _You shut up! I'm in no mood to put up with you today._ Aria's command voice snapped.

Aria stood as both the strangers stood. The blonde still hadn't said anything, and Aria couldn't help but wonder if his voice was as intoxicatingly beautiful as everything else about him.

 _I bet it is. We should try something to get him to talk._ Aria's Positive Thinking burst, relishing the fact that the Negative Thinking had to remain silent.

 _You shut up too! Or I'm put the two of you on Memory Duty together._ Aria's command voice snapped, trying to pay attention. As useful as Positive Thinking was, she need practical knowledge right now, and thankfully the split thinking of her mind didn't go that far. It was crowed enough as it was.

 _What?! But I'm not on Memory Duty, I shut up!_ Her Negative Thinking cried, indignantly.

"Now, we have a few questions for you, if you do not mind."

Aria shook her head, both to clear her it and show that she didn't mind any questions. "Com'on, we can go into the living room and talk." She led them out of the kitchen and into the living room. She curled up in a lazy-boy recliner and the two strangers sat stiffly on the couch.

"Um…We could start with your names?" Aria offered staring at them.

 _Duuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh!_ Sane Thinking said in a stupid, mental voice.

 _Sane Thinking, Memory Duty, now._ Aria's command voice stated, ignoring all arguments. She couldn't shake how much they looked like Legolas and Aragorn from Lord of the Rings, as Insane Thinking had already pointed out.

The dark-haired one spoke. "I am Aragorn son of Arathorn, my companion is Legolas of the Woodland Realm." He said gesturing to the beautiful blonde beside him.

Aria, who'd just taken a sip of hot chocolate, suddenly began gagging on it. "What?" she exclaimed. _This is f-ing nuts! They can't be Legolas and Aragorn!_ Aria's Frightening Thinking burst, engulfing the mind in fear. _They're fictional characters made up by J.R.R. Tolkien!_ Aria's mind raced with confusion as the fear ran rampant for a moment.

Then the small voice of Sane Thinking echoed out of her memories, saying to her, w _ell, think about it. They do look like them. They are dressed for_ _Lord of the Rings._ _And the guy's ears are pointed, like an elf._

 _All of you shut up! NOW!_ Aria's command voice demanded sternly. _Frightening Thinking if you don't stop, right now, you are going to join Sane Thinking, on Memory Duty._ Enlightening Thinking snickered. _You too! All of you! Quiet or you'll all be stuck on Duty together._

"Are you alright?" Aragorn asked, concern spreading across his face as she coughed and made a funny face as the voice in command reprimanded her Thoughts.

"Yeah, just went down the wrong pipe." He nodded confused. No way was Aria telling him she was listening to the many voices in her head. "So, Aragorn and Legolas?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yes, you seem to have heard of us."

"You could say that. What are you doing here?" She studied them both, trying to keep the surprise off her face about the silence of her Thoughts, no one liked Memory Duty. Then, before Aragorn could answer, "And why hasn't he said anything yet?" she burst, referring to Legolas.

Aria's command voice growled mentally. _Insane Thinking, Memory Duty!_ She snapped. _And never take command like that, again!_

Aria's Command Thoughts turned back to Legolas and Aragorn's answer to her answer. Legolas had been attentive and cold the entire time they'd been eating and now sat at rapt attention, sweeping the room with his gaze every so often and keeping his head cocked, listening for any sound of a threat of any kind.

Aragorn looked at Legolas. "He does not feel comfortable in this world, the dismal amount of magic here is causing him to worry."

Aria nodded. "Yeah, there's a saying, 'The closest thing we have to magic is love, and that's why everyone wants it, but not everyone can get it right the first time.'" She looked down, fingering her mug, thinking of her troubles with love or life in general.

Aria's Command Thoughts growled mentally, again. _Insane Thinking, you are on Memory Duty. That means you keep them at bay, not help them come forward!_ Her voice ended in a mental shout. _Now do your job properly or I'll keep you there all night!_

 _I'm sorry, Commander, I couldn't keep hold of Insane and keep the Memories at bay at the same time._ Sane Thinking apologized.

 _It is fine, Sane. Just do your best. You can come off Duty when we go to sleep._ Aria's Command Thoughts said softly.

For the first time, Legolas looked at her, actually studied her. "You have had troubles, with the love magic?" he asked.

Aria looked up at the sound of his voice, awe written on her face. It was as beautiful as the rest of him. "W-well…" She looked down, her cheeks flushed. She didn't even know how to answer him. He was so perfect, so heavenly, it didn't seem right for him to be there, sitting in _her_ living room. She didn't deserve this kind of honor. He was too good for her, for her to even be in his presence.

 _Do you need help?_ Enlightening Thinking asked softly, the other Thoughts, not on Memory Duty murmured agreements and offers.

 _Yes._ Aria's Command Thought answered, softly. _We do this together, at the exact same time. Make it look like it doesn't matter._ They all murmured their understanding. Sane and Insane Thinking watched, suddenly attentive and in unison, keeping the Memories at bay together.

"Y-yeah," Aria stumbled. "Um…yeah…my first mom…my birth mom, she didn't want me…" She paused and shifted. "Well…she abandon me…in the winter, alone…um…my first adoptive father…well…he beat me, because…well, I don't know why, but…" As she stumbled, again, the two warriors exchanged surprised glances. "My…um…second adoptive father…well, he was a drunk, he…um…he liked to bring buddies over…they weren't very nice…" Aria paused. "Well…um…I don't like to go into how his buddies were…" They were nearly her worse memories, those none of her Thoughts ever thought about. They had enough trouble with the Nightmare Memories as it was. Aria did think about her second adoptive father though. She didn't like how close this buddies would get to her. She hated the pinches, the touching, the rubbing, just thinking about it made her shutter. "Anyway," she continued, "not going into the rest, this is my eleventh home, and hopefully it stays as nice as it is now.

The companions exchanged looks again. They did not like what this young human was insinuating with her second father's buddies, they had seen the shutter. But they felt even worse that this strange girl was seeing these men touching her in such an offhanded light. What had happened, that this terrible darkness seemed light?

"Well, I kinda wanna know the answer to my first question."

Aragorn smiled a little at the girl's brightness despite the harshness of her words, it was odd and yet relieving.

 _Well done, guys._ Aria's Command Thoughts said gently. _Keep it strong._ They all murmured their thanks, the heavy weight they now carried in their thoughts was too strong for them to lightly argue amongst themselves now.

"We believe it was the accidental work of our young hobbit friends."

Aria smiled at the thought of Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Frodo.

 _How are we smiling at the thought of Frodo?_ Negative Thinking asked.

 _Cause we're thinking about before Mt. Doom, duh._ Positive Thinking answered in a sarcastic tone.

Aria smiled more, inwardly as her Thoughts eased up from the heavy burden of her Memories.

"What happened? How'd they manage to send you here?" She asked.

"They were playing with Gandalf's staff. He was certain nothing would come of it, but here we are, wherever here is." Aragorn sounded exasperated.

Aria was full of curiosity now. "Well, where'd you show up at?" She asked.

 _Cool,_ Enlightening Thinking interjected. _This is getting interesting._

 _Hush, Enlightening._

 _Yes, Commander._

Now a moment's pause to acknowledge the reader, and Aria. You are probably wondering, 'What? Aria's just accepting that Legolas and Aragorn are Legolas and Aragorn, simply because Legolas's ears? There are such things as prosthetics.' Well, let us speak of Aria's character and backstory. Aria was born to a mother of no rich means. She does not remember her name, and was never told later on. All Aria does remember is cold nights in the basement or hungry days without food. She remembers vague yelled insults, including 'useless brat,' 'devil child of Satan,' and 'dirty worthless repulsive excuse of a human.' When Aria was four years old, a very long time of having to put up with these sort of things, she was found left in a ditch full of half frozen water, in the freezing grips of a North Dakota winter. She was taken to the hospital by a kind old lady, and surprised everybody by not having hypothermia or pneumonia or any such disease.

Moving on a pace. She was placed in the foster care system. She was adopted by an elderly man with barely enough money to care for her. She was fine for about the first day. She was immediately beaten upon doing anything wrong. She was repeatedly punished for concepts her young mind of four could not understand. It took three years for the social services to realize that she was so harshly treated, by now this poor young girl is seven.

She was taken back into the foster care system, where she spent four more years going from one home to the next, uncared for and unwanted. By now she is eleven and has gone through seven homes counting that of her biological mother. She does not know how to love or connect. To save herself from the pain of moving from one place to another, Aria now buries herself in books, friends she can take with her wherever she must go. Rapidly growing beyond the level of a seven year old and reaching that of a high school student in the space of that four years.

At eleven, Aria is adopted by another man of no young means. He lives in New York City, New York, a far cry from North Dakota. Still she must go where she is told. She is moved out of her home state and to the large hustle and bustle of New York City. She is taken in and is immediately worried. The place she now lives in is dirty, stinky, and crowded. Her first night is quiet as she tensely tosses and turns. Her first day is spent in her room, however, as her second night falls, all quiet is broken. Her new 'father' arrives with his buddies, drunk. As Aria mentioned to Legolas and Aragorn, her 'father's' buddies weren't nice. They got too close to the poor eleven year old. Now to keep this relatively safe for the young to read, we shall not go into too much.

This goes on for the poor girl for another three years. She is then fourteen and staring on her ninth home as she is automatically adopted by a couple in Sacramento, California. Now, Aria pays much more attention to the world of fantasy than reality, caring not to see the ugliness she must go through, never understanding what was going on and never taught.

The home of the couple was nice. It was clean, big, quiet, and all around well cared for. Aria is happy for six months, well not happy, for she hardly knows what the word means. She is content, keeping to her room, reading, when not in school. When in school, she pays attention, does her work, and never talks. Doing only enough to survive and blend in being invisible. Her new family is kind and try to reach out to her. Slowly, Aria comes out of the shell of emotionless that she has built in the first fourteen years of her life. As she opens her eyes and sees the love that has appeared in her world. She is awed and fearful.

Now, you, Reader, may be asking, 'Okay, what happens next?' I'm sorry to say that something does happen next in a very bad sense. Her new family is brutally murdered shattering the quiet peace that Aria had rapidly grown used to in those six months.

Before moving onto the next horrendous chapter of Aria's life, I feel it necessary to mention something that is of some near-great importance or I wouldn't need to mention it, of course. While in the comfortable home of the couple in California, Aria received a necklace from her new mother. This necklace was gold. Yes, real gold. It had a simple chain. It had a gold circle hanging from it, roughly the size of a nickel. It within this circle of gold was a web of gold that created just that, a web of gold. The design was of next to no importance. This necklace was found in an old antique shop, sold by an old lady, who told Aria she should always keep it on or at least near her, for it was essential to her future. Aria did not regard this advice, but kept is on or near her due to the feeling of tolerance and caring she got from the woman who had given it to her.

Now, continuing on with Aria's dismal and darkly sad, loveless life. At fourteen and a half, Aria is placed back in the foster care system. She is then adopted by an exceedingly wealthy woman that could be acutely described as a real life Cruella de Ville. Aria was given a nice room and nice things. Aria was mildly content, for a single night. Upon her second night, she was awakened very roughly and taken down below the mansion, to its basement. Again for the mental stability and health of the younger readers, it is best not to get into the goings on of what happened beneath the mansion of the 'Cruella de Ville'. However, for the reader to understand it _is_ mandatory to say, _this_ is where she got her worst memories.

When poor Aria was finally saved from this Hell, for that is what it was to her. Aria was as strange and odd and bright as she is when we met her at the very beginning of this story. She saw only a single home for a single month before coming to a rest at the age of seventeen years, four months old, at the home she now occupies, in great comfort, conversing with Aragorn and Legolas.

Aria in her horrors at the 'Cruella de Ville' mansion, formed exactly eight different personalities, which she names six after types of thought and the other two being her Command Thoughts, and her Subconscious Mind, who hardly speaks, thus the name. The other six names being, Enlightening Thinking, Frightening Thinking, Negative Thinking, Positive Thinking, Sane Thinking, and Insane Thinking. Nothing more need be said about them, their personalities will become much more obvious throughout the course of this story.

Now, about her simple acceptance of Legolas's and Aragorn's claim to who they are. I believe I already mentioned her more acute acceptance of the fictional to the nonfictional. She has accepted these two due to the fact that they, A: maybe who they claim to be; or B: a figment of her imagination, something that runs wild throughout her many Thoughts. Either way she is ready and willing to accept one or the other, or both, because the Lord of the Rings was and is her favorite story and she know that in the end they all end up happy, many sailing to the Undying Lands to be free of their pain forever. She has also had many of her favorite characters help her and her Thoughts through their pain and it helped a great deal. Another reason for easygoing and accepting nature.

No more need be said of Aria. What else that needs to be known of her will be revealed through telling of this story. Speaking of which, let's get back to it. I believe Aria's Command Thoughts just told Enlightening Thinking to be quiet about Aragorn's and Legolas's arrival being interesting.


	2. Chapter 2 Return to Middle Earth

Chapter 2 Return to Middle Earth

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya. Please read this fanfiction, it isn't mandatory to understand mine, but it is still really good. Also, I may spell things wrong and I'm sorry I'm not perfect. If I spell something wrong, like a name, let me now so I can fix it. Lastly, please review.**

 **Sweetdixie.17-Thanks, I was cracking myself up writing them. Afterward, I realized it was a very Gollum/Sméagol relationship, except with eight voices instead of just two. Even though they make the reader laugh, I also want to show that they really do help her and that they aren't there just because she crazy insane. Also, it is quite reasonable to say that the other Thoughts are afraid of Subconscious, which will be proved a little in this chapter**

 **. .ra-Thanks. I have nothing else to say because I know you like it but you're also bias. Your praise still makes me feel good though.**

 **Chapter 2 Return to Middle Earth**

"Before we get to that," Aragorn began, "I would like to enquire about where exactly 'here' is?" Legolas looked between his friend and the girl before continuing his attentive sweep of the room.

"Earth." She answered.

 _Swell,_ Negative Thinking commented. _He ought to understand that perfectly._

 _Negative Thinking, Memory Duty._ Command Thoughts stated. _Anybody else have something to say?_ There wasn't as sound. _Good, then let's keep things this quiet while I manage this._

"Earth?" He sounded slightly exasperated, again.

"Redding, California, United States of America, North American Continent, Earth, Our Solar System, Milky Way Galaxy, the Universe."

 _And you put_ me _on Memory Duty._ Negative Thinking sulked. _Look at you. That was so sarcastic that even Positive Thinking would agree it was negative._ Command Thoughts didn't answer, purposely ignoring the sulky voice.

Aragorn's face went from one of confusion to one of annoyance. "Let us go and see where we first appeared." He rose and Legolas did with him. Aria jumped up and set her chocolate mug on the coffee table and bounded out of the house after them, before running back inside, taking her mug to the kitchen, then yelling up the stairs to her knew family.

"Mrs. Nara! I'm going out for a time, I'll be back later!"

"Take care and be sure you left things clean!" Aria didn't answer, she had already run out the door and caught up with Legolas and Aragorn.

They were all quiet as they climbed into Aria's Ford Mustang. The two visitors to the world of technology looked mildly uncomfortable at the car but Aria paid them no mind. She pulled out of the driveway and quickly made her way to the hustle and bustle of the city. They made it out of the city in no time, which surprised Aria. As they got further and further from the city, making their way to where Aria had found the two.

 _Commander?_ Positive Thinking asked.

 _What, Positive._

 _Can we talk about something? I'm bored. It's too quiet._

Command Thoughts didn't answer. _It's quiet._ Frightening Thoughts whispered. _Too quiet. They're probably waiting until we're a good ways from the city before they beat us and leave us in a cold ditch to die._

The other Thoughts, who get highly jumpy when it's silent, all began to talk at once. Aria jumped at the sudden activity in her mind causing her to jerk the wheel, which caused her to swerve, and Aria yelped and tried to correct but overcorrected as her Thoughts ran rampant through her mind. Both Aragorn and Legolas cried out in shock at the sudden swerve and the overcorrection.

 _"_ _SHUT UP ALL OF YOU! NOW!"_ She knew she screamed it out loud, but she didn't care. She didn't care about the looks of alarm on Aragorn's and Legolas's faces. She took a deep breath at the silence, trying to calm her pounding hear. Tears began to slip down her face.

 _Guys!_ Command Thoughts exclaimed. _Look what you did! Next time if you have a problem voice it one at a time and slowly. As a whole we make up Aria as she is now but this kind of stress takes itself out on me, because I am in charge and the main Thought Process._ Mental tears seemed to fall as the physical ones were. _That scared me. We could have been hurt and we startled Aragorn and Legolas. Please keep quiet unless I ask. If I give permission to speak freely, then you may but until then, keep quiet and watch._

"I'm sorry." Aria whispered to her passengers. "The memories get away from me sometimes." Aria couldn't stop her body from shaking violently. The sudden fear of all of her Thoughts had cause no one to be on Memory Duty, even for an instant and an instant was all it took for one to float to the surface and make itself remembered. This particular one involved a very cruel whip that made her back sore just thinking about it.

Aragorn looked into the back seat at Legolas and whispered something in a language that Aria didn't understand, but sounded familiar. _"Should we ask?"_

Legolas answered in the same language. _"Yes, but carefully. We do not want to frighten her and cause her to lose control of this strange metal beast."_

Aragorn nodded, then turned back to Aria. "It is alright. You have had a very hard childhood, yes?" He asked.

Aria nodded. "Yeah, you could say that." She whispered, never taking her tear-filled eyes off the road. "I don't really want to talk about it, because that means I'll have to think about it and it is hard enough keeping the Memories at bay without me thinking of them." Aragorn nodded and Legolas said something to him in the language they both knew.

 _"_ _What could be so bad, that has happened to her in this world that she might be like this and feel this pain and fear? Not even Sirya acts like she does, in all of her strangeness, and he had a very hard elfling-hood."_

Aragorn shook his head and replied. _"I do not know mellon nin, but this is a strange world, it may hold new and terrible danger that we do not know of."_ Aragorn's reply included _Mellon Nin,_ words that Aria did understand. _They must be speaking in Sindarin._ She commented to her Thoughts. They did not reply, as she did not ask for one. _Thanks guys, I still love you and need you._

 _We know,_ Frightening Thoughts answered now, feeling the need. _We won't leave you until you can be strong without us._

Aria smiled to herself, tears coming to her eyes, but out of happiness this time. The Thoughts may have been in her head and they may have even been of her own imagination, saying exactly what she needed, but it still made her feel loved. Something she didn't get to feel often.

Aria looked around the clearing where they stood. _This is it?_ Negative Thinking asked from the depths of Aria's mind.

 _Negative, you are on Memory Duty, now shut up and do your job._ Command Thoughts said offhandedly, occupied with staring at the clearing. There was nothing special about it, at all. It was just a weed-filled, bug-full clearing. Birds were chirping and the sound of frogs and insects were kind of annoying.

 _Why do I have to be on Memory Duty?_ Negative Thinking asked, interrupting Command Thoughts train of thought. _Sane, Insane and Subconscious are already on Duty._

Command Thoughts growled. _Because you are being punished. Now if you don't shut up, you're going to be on Night Duty with Subconscious._ Negative Thinking shuttered. None of the Thoughts really liked Subconscious. She was strange, quiet, strong, and always on Memory Duty. She was, to the thinking of all the Thoughts, the actual reason Aria was at the level of safe insanity that she was. Subconscious remembered all of the Memories and kept all of them at bay. Command Thoughts knew that she would be in charge, save the fact that that would be a direct threat to Aria's health, which was everyone's main concern at all times.

"This is where we first arrived." Aragorn stated interrupting Aria's Thoughts.

"Do you have the power to return us to our homes?" Legolas asked looking at her. Now that he had really gotten a good look at her, abet the brief exchange in the girl's living room. He noticed, she carried the same look Sirya carried when Legolas had first rescued him. The guarded look that hid years of pain and fear, but there was something about this girl's look. It was almost as if...as if she wasn't alone. Her eyes showed that though she'd known pain, but…she looked as if someone had taken her and healed her, as best as one could be healed. However, the girl's outburst in the car at the beginning of the ride caused Legolas to believe that perhaps this healing came in the form of more than one voice in her head with different personalities, giving her a sense of companionship through self-made companions.

"I don't…"Aria paused, as her Thoughts interrupted.

 _Commander, would it be the best idea to tell them you don't know magic?_ Enlightening Thinking asked.

 _No,_ Command Thoughts answered, after some consideration. _We cannot lie to them though._

 _No,_ Enlightening Thinking agreed. _Give me a minute to think of something._

All was quiet both in Aria's head and the clearing as Enlightening Thought thought. Legolas and Aragorn studied this strange girl as she looked around the clearing. They knew she was going to finish her thought at one point but she was taking her time.

Finally, _tell them about the necklace you got at the antique shop, if it's ever going to matter, it'd be now._

"A few years back, I was given something. The lady that gave it to me told me to always wear it because it would essential to my future." Aria turned to the two and pulled the necklace out from under her shirt. "If it's ever going to be cryptically essential to my future, I'd say it's now." Both men stepped forward to get a better look at the necklace. As they studied it, Aria's Thoughts wandered.

 _Guys, guess what we haven't thought about in a while?_ Positive Thinking asked brightly.

 _Life?_ Enlightening Thinking answered sarcastically.

 _Death?_ Frightening Thinking whispered fearfully.

 _Nope, the_ _Magic Tree House._ Positive Thinking answered.

Command Thoughts sighed in exasperation. _Positive, is this really the time?_ Command Thoughts asked critically.

 _Yeah, Commander. Remember the days of Jack and Annie?_ Positive Thinking sighed. _Remember the words, Commander, the magical words that took them away on grand adventures?_ A sober feeling crept through Aria's mind, even the Thoughts on Memory Duty thought about the childhood days spent hidden behind the beautiful books of Mary Pope Osborne.

"I wish I could go there." Aria whispered out loud. She couldn't help it, there were actually things she missed about her childhood. She didn't get much time to think more on it. As soon as Aria said the words out loud a tremendous wind cut through the clearing, lifting the three of them off the ground. Aria's world went black and she gasp as she took a hit from something, felt like she'd been sucker punched.

Suddenly she, along with Aragorn and Legolas, were dropped quiet harshly right into the courtyard of the House of Lord Elrond in Imladris. Exclamations rang out at the three appeared out of nowhere. The guards trained their weapons on the newcomers before recognizing them as the foster son of their lord and the prince of Mirkwood.

"Inform Lord Elrond and Gandalf that they're back!" One of the guards called as other helped up the new arrivals.

"Estel, your father has been most worried." One of the guards said as he offered a hand to the gasping warrior.

"Who is this, my lord?" Another guard asked as he offered a hand to Aria, wearily taking in her strange clothing.

"Aria." She answered for herself, ignoring the hand and picking herself up. She took a deep breath and looked around. She took in all of the stunned elves in the courtyard, the Lord Elrond, Gandalf, Gimli and his dwarves, the other Mirkwood elves, the hobbits, and the humans all staring or coming toward her before her Thoughts completely freaked out.

 _Oh, Holy Mother of All Elves of Middle Earth!_ Frightening Thought gasped. _I'm not insane enough for this kind of torment!_

 _What the hell are you talking about?_ Insane Thought snapped. _I'm freaking batter than a fruit bat in a meat market and I can't handle this!_

 _What the hell are we supposed to do now?_ Positive Thinking asked. _What are we going to do! What are we going to do!_

All of the Thoughts, save Subconscious and Command Thoughts, burst into hysterics.

 _EVERYBODY SHUT UP!_ Command Thoughts shouted, thankfully not out loud as she had in the car with Legolas and Aragorn. _The next person to say anything without permission gets Night Duty! We are going to figure this out together, but not like were completely bat-shit crazy._

"Estel!" Lord Elrond exclaimed, hugging his son. "Thank Valar you're safe!"

"Welcome back, Prince Legolas, Lord Aragorn." Gandalf said.

"Thank you, Mithrandir." Legolas stated.

"May I offer my apologizes for the mistake that was made by myself and the Halflings?"

"They are not necessary, Mithrandir." Aragorn said turning to the wizard. "This young enchantress helped us return." He gesture to Aria, who stood in silence surrounded by the guards of the House of Lord Elrond, a worried and strained expression on her face.

"Estel, have you forgotten your manners?" His father asked, hinting at the need for an introduction.

"I am sorry, Ada. This is Aria, an enchantress of Earth. Aria, this is my father, Lord Elrond and Gandalf the Gray."

"It is an honor to meet you. And thank you for returning my son to me." Lord Elrond offering his hand. Gandalf, however, did nothing, merely stared at her, studied her.

Aria nodded, not saying anything and not taking the offered hand. _Hey guys, should we show them what we know about Middle Earth?_ Command Thoughts asked.

 _No,_ Enlightening Thinking answered. _Let it all work out as it should._

 _But if we know how it happens, shouldn't we make sure it stays on track?_ Sane Thinking asked.

 _It would not be wise. We may accidentally change something._ Enlightening Thinking answered.

 _Yeah,_ Positive Thinking agreed, _Cause I, for one, wouldn't be able to resist trying to save Borimir from dying._

 _I agree with Positive and Enlightening,_ Insane Thinking added, _I would want to save Haldir as well._ _But just because we tell them that we know about all of this doesn't mean we'll be going with the Fellowship._ Insane Thinking offered as a nice counter argument.

 _We do not have time for this._ Command Thoughts interjected. _Continue to think on it and we can discuss what we've come up with later, until then keep quiet so I can concentrate._ There were murmurs of 'yes ma'am's and it was silent in Aria's mind.

When Aria again was paying attention to the world outside of her mind, she noticed it was very silent. _Great, they must have asked us something._ Lord Elrond studied Aria a moment. "Please, do not answer, this is not the time nor the place for questions. The three of you must clean yourselves up and have something to eat before we discuss anything at length." He then turned and swept back into the Last Homely House, followed by Gandalf, Aragorn, and Legolas, who gently placed a hand on Aria's elbow and guided her with them inside. The others about the courtyard returned to their various businesses.

"You should be more careful about listening." He whispered.

"How long were you waiting for my answer?" She asked back, taking her arm out of Legolas's hand.

"Long enough for it to be awkward and seem like you did not want to answer, but not long enough for anyone notice anything was off with you, save Lord Elrond and Mithrandir, who are both very sharp men."

"Who says anything's off with me?" Aria snapped, defensively.

"Everything you say and do, your very being. You constantly drop hints about a very terrible childhood and early life, yet you are as happy as a hobbit in a room full of food. That in itself says there is something off about you. Do not be so eager to show this to the whole of the world, it could be used very harshly against you."

Aria smiled very venomously. "I have yet to meet someone who could give me a worse experience than what I've been through. I survived, that means that I can survive again. I became strong and I can be stronger still. Just because I show the happy, 'hobbit' side of myself does not mean that the darkness within me that saved me, is not watching attentively for any sign of danger. Just as you were watching in my living room. Except I wear a mask, so no one can see where my eyes are really looking. Do not think to challenge my strength, Legolas Thandruillion. I am stronger and more dangerous than the hottest fires from the strongest fire drake." Aria then sped up to where Aragorn and Lord Elrond were talking. They paused as she appeared, then looked back at the scowl on Legolas's face.

"You should be careful, Enchantress. Do not make enemies where none need to exsit." Lord Elrond advised in a soft and beautiful voice.

 _Why are we not surprised or impressed at the elves?_ Command Thoughts asked.

 _Perhaps because we do not want to show any emotions._ Enlightening Thinking offered.

 _Or, maybe you're as nutty as a squirrel in a nut shop, like me._ Insane Thinking offered as well.

 _Are we going to answer to his obvious lack of knowledge about us?_ Negative Thinking asked. _Cause I, for one, want to give him something to make him shiver with surprise and fear._

 _Negative Thinking, your being punished quit talking._ Command Thoughts paused to consider Negative Thinking's question, despite the reprimanding. _Yes, I quite like the idea._ Her Thoughts all cackled maliciously, they enjoyed a little fear every now and again. It made them feel like they weren't the only ones in the world to feel fear, and this was cause for relief.

Aria looked at Lord Elrond. The coldness that appeared in her eyes startled Aragorn. They were the eyes of someone entirely different from the strange, bright girl they'd spent the whole morning and part of the last evening with.

"Lord Elrond, everyone is my enemy until they prove themselves an ally. I do not and never will love those allies, I will merely tolerate them, so long as they are needed. I have never loved any creature in my life and I do not plan on starting. I have survived this long because my heart is locked away and guarded with the fiery vengeance of a greedy fire drake. None have yet succeeded in breaking it out and none ever will. I will never risk my survival for the sake of another. I have worked too hard and been through too much to risk it." Aria then turned her attention away from the startled gray eyes of the Ranger and his father.

Aragorn whispered something to Lord Elrond in Sindarin. _"She has told us small hints of great and painful childhood, filled with pain and anger. Her life has been a loveless one. Legolas believes that there are multiple voices in her mind to give her the companionship needed to live, but never has had any outside companion who has ever shown her any great deal of care."_

Lord Elrond answered to this, causing Aragorn to gaps in surprise. " _That is evident, but to say such things. She had more than a painful and loveless childhood. She would have had to been tortured to become such as creature as she is now, in all of her oddness."_

Aragorn responded. " _That is not possible. Why would someone do this to her? She may be an enchantress, but she is a very young one, and truthfully she is not very good at magic."_

Lord Elrond shook his head and said something in return. " _I do not know, ion nin. Perhaps we can learn and perhaps heal her if at all possible."_ He smiled almost menacingly. "If you do not love, Enchantress, then what have you to live for?"

Aria turned to look at him, her mouth hung open and her eyes could hardly seem to register the question. "What?"

"Why do you live, if not for love, for love is the easiest and best way to gain happiness. Never have I met any creature that is happier alone than with someone to share happiness with."

Aria walked quite a length, considering the question. Not really knowing what he asked. _I'm confused._ Positive Thinking said. _What does he mean? We're not being tortured, no one is hurting us, is that not cause enough for happiness. We have each other, it that not cause for happiness?_

 _I think,_ Enlightening Thinking began, _that he is asking why do we live when we do not have anyone to live for._

 _What?! That doesn't make any sense. We live for ourselves._ Negative Thinking burst.

 _Yes, but why?_ Sane Thinking asked. _Why did we save our lives, Aria's life, if she has none but the voices in her head to share her life with? We could have simply died and been done with it._

Aria's Thought began to be increasingly confused, until she couldn't quiet handle it quietly any more. "What?" She asked out loud. "What…" She stopped walking and grabbed her head. It had begun to hurt and her confusion scared her. "I don't…what…" The whole party stopped as her breath began to come in short gasps. "I…" She sank to the ground and tears began to stream from her eyes as she clutched her head tighter.

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND!" She cried in fear. She sobbed as her heart began to hurt and her Thoughts scrambled in confusion.

 _WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL DOES HE MEAN!_ Negative Thinking shouted.

Insane Thinking rocked back and forth. _Why are we alive?_ He asked over and over again. Command Thoughts felt/watched the other Thoughts. What was she going to do, she didn't know what was going on.

 _This damned elf!_ She snapped to Subconscious. _Just one question and he has us as weak and helpless as a babe!_

Subconscious' voice whispered to her through the great depths of Aria's Memories. _Would you like for me to take command for a time?_ She asked softly, speaking in a misty, half-asleep whisper as she always did, when she spoke.

 _Not yet,_ Command Thoughts answered. _But stay ready, I don't like this._

A hand was gently placed on Aria's shoulder. Out of instinct, Aria pulled away from the contact and shoved the owner of the hand away as hard as she could. Aria pressed against the wall and watched as Aragorn caught his father. Gandalf, Legolas, and others stood looking on. She didn't know or couldn't remember who they were. She shook in fear staring at their faces. They didn't look threatening, but her Thoughts were in such confusion that Command Thoughts had only Subconscious' cold hard advice to use.

"Are you alright, Ada?" Aragorn asked, surprised that his father had actually lost his balance.

"I am fine, Estel. Her fear gave her strength I did not account for." He turned his attention to Aria, who stared at him with the innocent and fearful eyes of a lost child. "Child, please do not fear. I did not mean to cause you pain with my question." He cautiously crept toward her. He reached a reassuring hand to her and her face instantly changed. A cold hard ice appeared in her vibrant violet eyes. She suddenly hissed like a cornered snake. Lord Elrond instantly stood and backed away from her.

Legolas watched this sudden change and knew it well. Thought Sirya never had a defensive side, his father, King Thranduil did. With this, Legolas knew that she would quiet mercilessly hurt any she thought were going to cause her pain.

Aria saw Lord Elrond's hand stretch out to her and Command Thoughts didn't know what to do. In an instant Subconscious took control and hiss at Lord Elrond warning him off. Subconscious was much more picky than Command Thoughts about who and what touched her, this meaning nothing and no one.

 _You must be hard and cold if you wish for us to survive._ She stated to Command Thoughts. _Do not show vulnerability, or fear. Be strong and do not show them the fear and lost-ness that we have as our constant companions._ As soon as Subconscious had taken control of Aria the other Thoughts had gone silent, but confusion and fear still emanated from them all.

"Child, I will not harm you. Let us speak together. Let me explain my question and ease your fears."

"I can ease my own fears!" She hissed. "I rely on no one but myself!"

Lord Elrond changed tactics, all who were around let the renowned healer try and help the strange human girl. "But you are curious." He stated staring her straight into her strange eyes. This new Aria didn't want gentleness, she wanted strength and fearlessness. "You are curious and you do not want gentle words but strength. You do not want to be held and pitied but to be impressed, given the freedom to choose, and the space to decide on your own." He offered his hand, but instead of to gently help her but to pull her up as one would a long-time companion, roughly and with much laughing. She took it and stood. As soon as she was on her feet she released his hand.

"Alright, you have my attention. Satisfy my curiosity. Impress me." She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him, judging this beautiful elven healer. She had to admit, now that she was really paying attention, all of Aria's Thoughts were quiet and in attention, this elf was very beautiful. Not in a young, reckless, Legolas sort of way, but in an old, wise, healing sort of way. He had dark hair that was long down his back. He had it with a simple half-up-half-down braid. His eyes sterling gray, shining with the light of stars, and giving away his age and knowledge despite his ageless face. He had a pale complexion and angular cheekbones. He was tall and lithe and he showed nobleness and strength in everything he did.

Lord Elrond allowed himself a small smile. _Success, however strangely I accomplished it._ "Let us go to my office, and I will do as you ask." Ignoring the others about them, Lord Elrond offered his arm. She smiled coldly and took it, the slight cautious hesitation was not lost to the perceptive eyes of Gandalf, Legolas, and Aragorn. "Erestor, no one is to disturb us. I will call when I need you." The elven lord's advisor and best friend nodded and made shooing motions to all those around.


	3. Chapter 3 Aria's Heart

Chapter 3 Aria's Heart

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya. Again, I may spell things wrong and I'm sorry I'm not perfect. If I spell something wrong, like a name, let me now so I can fix it. Lastly, please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **Sweetdixie.17-Thank you. Encouragement is always welcome.**

 **Celridel-Yes, with the 'knew family' thing I did mean new family, typo. And Aria calls her Mrs. Nara because she doesn't really do the Mom and Dad thing and it's kind of disrespectful to just call her new parents by their first name, so she uses their last name. I'll have to go back and clarify that, thank you for pointing it out. And thank you for reviewing.**

 **Mirkwood Warrior-Thank you.**

 **. .ra-Thank you as well. I enjoy writing about the randomness of the Thoughts and yes it makes sense to jump a little from one thing to the next because the unstable jumping in Aria's Thoughts. I'm also glad you liked her freak out session. She wouldn't understand a question like what Elrond asked. I got the idea from Naruto, where Gara freaks out about how everyone in Konah keep protecting each other. (BTW, don't know how to spell Konah)**

 **Chapter 3 Aria's Heart**

Note: When the font turns to Arial, it is first person because Aria's Heart is now in control and this is the actual Aria.

Aria sat stock straight, judgmentally eyeing the others in the private sitting room with her. Lord Elrond lounged beside her on one of the couches, he had a glass of wine that he was nursing. Aria couldn't help but think this seemed more like a Thranduil thing than an Elrond, but Aria didn't say anything, nor did her Thoughts, for Subconscious was still in control. Gandalf sat forward in an armchair, staring at the fire, deep in thought. Legolas sat across from her on another couch with a young boy-elf. They were whispering back and forth, and Aria had a sneaky suspicion he was blind, because of the glazed look in his eyes and how he stared dead ahead even when conversing with his companion. Aragorn and Arwen stood arm in arm, leaning on the wall near the door, also whispering. Elladan and Elohir stood side by side staring out the window at changing leaves of Imlardis. Erestor and Glorifindel had yet to return after being sent after something by Lord Elrond.

Aria's eyes snapped to the door as it opened, admitting the two missing elves. Lord Elrond followed them with his eyes as they approached. All whispering stopped and Gandalf looked up from his thinking.

 _Subconscious?_ Enlightening Thinking asked, timidly. Subconscious turned her attention to the Thought.

 _Yes?_

 _What exactly is Elrond going to do? Do you know?_

Subconscious gave the equivalent of a very cold mental smile. _Of course not, that is why he must impress us. Tell me, Enlightening, do you fear that he may heal us? That he may succeed in bonding us into one person once more? That Aria, our Heart will once again take control of her life and mind?_

 _Well…_ Enlightening Thinking stopped. Was he afraid? What would happen if they were healed? If they became one voice and one mind once again? He didn't like the mention of their Heart. Aria, their Heart, was who they protected, who they were there for. It was an unwritten rule not to speak of her, for fear that she would accidentally take control of the body, leaving her vulnerable to Memories and pain.

 _I do._ Insane Thinking piped up.

 _Me too._ Frightening Thinking agreed. _What will happen if we are healed?_ He asked, voicing Enlightening Thinking's fears. All the Thoughts became restless at this.

 _Guys,_ Command Thoughts called softly, to get all their attentions. _We may not remember a time before we were eight, but that does not mean we need to fear. If we are healed into one mind, then that means we need not fear our Memories any longer and our Heart will be strong once again._ This calmed them but then jumped to attention when Lord Elrond turned to them and began to speak.

"My child," he began, his voice smooth and calm. "You did not understand the concept of my question, 'If you do not have love then why do you live?' I will explain myself if you will allow." All eyes in the room were on her. Aria eyed the elf lord before nodding slowly. Lord Elrond stared into her eyes and was surprised to see, that though this suddenly different Aria was cold and slightly seductive—even he couldn't deny it—she was also fearful. The ice in the violet eyes was a front, a mask to hide the fear that never went away.

"I have lived a great many years," he began, "I have seen a different ages, ages of darkness and fear and war. In the times I've seen that the good of Arda prevails. It prevails long into the nights full of darkness and fear, long past when they are weary. Why? How do they push so hard, when it would be much easier to give up and move on to a place devoid of darkness and evil?" He paused and studied Aria. Her brow creased and a shiver ran down her spine.

 _It's like he can read our mind!_ Positive Thinking all but shrieked.

 _Make him stop, Subconscious!_ Sane Thinking and Negative Thinking stated at the exact same time with the exact same uneasy alarmed tone.

 _Hush up and listen to him._ Command Thoughts stated evenly. She was just as unnerved as the other Thoughts but she had given Subconscious control and it was up to Subconscious to listen if she wished. And she did, she wanted to be impressed and Command Thoughts believed she was well on her way to being so.

Aria looked down and Subconscious answered Lord Elrond's question with one of her own. "Are you asking this in reference to me or to make me think of why others might?"

Lord Elrond smiled slyly. "Well, that depends my eccentric one, which will you willingly understand and divulge?" All in the sitting room had eyes only for the pair, but often muttered comments to their companions, save Gandalf and Glorifindel, who both kept to themselves, watching with rapt attention.

Aria eyed Lord Elrond, narrowing her eyes dangerously. "My answer depends on how you will then use the information that I have divulged."

A sigh sounded in Aria's mind. _Let's play ring-around-the-rosies why don't we!_ Negative Thinking said sarcastically. _We'll sooooooo get aaaaaalllllll the answers we need._

 _SILENCE!_ Subconscious snapped at him, very harshly. Command Thoughts gave an equivalent of a mental frown.

 _What yourself, Subconscious. You are only in charge because of me and if you are going to violently abuse the other Thoughts, then I will reclaim charge and we will deal with this my way._

 _Oh, and what way is that?_ Subconscious snapped haughtily. _Is it going to be were you weep and cry about begging for pity?_ The other Thoughts were vaguely aware of Lord Elrond answering to Aria's statement but none could focus on it as Command Thoughts instantly tried to take command back from Subconscious. As her mind began to fight itself, Aria, the real Aria who watched and let her Thoughts and mind command her body began to weep from within the cage that protected her. She was the heart, but she was so afraid of the hurt that she no longer cared to venture out of the self-imposed cage.

Physically, as Command Thoughts and Subconscious began to fully fight, Aria screamed and grabbed her head as lightening white pain began to pulse and flash through her whole being. She cried desperately, lost and confused as no one was in control and it all hurt.

At her sudden change in of forbearance, Lord Elrond set his wine glass down and moved slightly closer to her. At her sudden scream, the whole room jumped. Lord Elrond scrambled forward and grabbed Aria's hands as she began to claw at her hair and face, pain etched in every line and pure terror flooding from her odd violet eyes.

"It is alright!" He gasped, his voice full of surprise but still soft. "Please, do not harm yourself. I did not mean to cause you fear."

Aria rejected his attempt to console her. She fought him, her screams ripping through the room. Legolas stood to help Lord Elrond, but not before shoving the young elf near him in the direction of Aragorn and Arwen. "Get him out of here!" He exclaimed, moving forward to help Elrond with Aria. Arwen instantly wrapped her arms around his shoulders and guided him out as Aragorn joined Legolas and his father.

"Glorafindel, get some sedatives!" Elrond cried as he wrestled with Aria, who continued to scream and fight the three males. Before Glorafindel could leave, Gandalf stood and raised his staff, calling out short set of words and the chaotic room instantly fell silent as Aria slumped forward into Lord Elrond's arms.

The sudden tension that had filled the room decapitated. "What in the Arda was that?" Legolas exclaimed, throwing himself back on the couch he started on. Lord Elrond sighed and brushed Aria's long dark hair off her face. Aragorn joined him and Glorafindel exchanged glances with Gandalf and Elrond.

"Legolas, you told Aragorn that you believed that she had different personalities—voices—in her mind. I believe it wasn't something I said, but something they said that scared her."

Erestor exchanged glances with the twins. "What do you speak of, Ada?" Elladan asked.

Gandalf sighed. "This youngling, is a strange creature with a very heavy set of memories. She is broken, hopefully not beyond repair. Even if she is beyond mental repair, she will still need physical care."

"What do you believe should be done, Mithrandir?" Elrond asked, regarding the wizard. He wasn't sure what to do with Aria. He would try to heal her—of course—but he didn't do as well in the mental/emotional healing as he did in the physical. His wife was proof of this, although this could be judging him too harshly. Her rapidly changing minds and attitudes were hard to keep up with and Elrond wasn't certain he could help her, without fear of hurting her worse.

"For now, she needs to be taken and laid down in a bed and left with a healer to care for her. Soothing herbs and teas as soon as she wakes, until she is stable once again…"

"And after that?" Elohir asked.

Gandalf frowned, his wise eyes glazing over for a moment and closed half-way. All in the room exchanged glances as the wizard lost himself in thoughts. Suddenly he snapped open all the way and all eyes turned back to him. "You will take her to Lady Galadriel." He rested his eye on Lord Elrond. "One of your twins will accompany the Fellowship to Lothlórien, were the Lady of the Light shall seek to help her as best she can."

Lord Elrond's eyes darkened at the prospect of one of his sons joining the Fellowship, before he could say anything, however, Elohir shouldered Elladan. "It's your turn, El, besides Grandmother has not seen you in a longtime."

Elladan stepped forward with a sigh. "I will accompany you and protect her."

Gandalf nodded, accepting this. "She will be your first and only priority. If anything were to happen to the rest of us, no matter what, she is to be protected. She must make it to Lothlorien at all costs." Elladan nodded, determination in his eyes, as he tried to mask the questions that sprung up at the 'at all costs'. Legolas was not so controlled.

"At all costs, Mithrandir? Why do you say this as if she were more important that the destruction of the Ring of Power?"

Gandalf surprised them all by saying, "Because she _is_ more important than the destruction of the Ring of Power. The Ring will endure if lost and we can find it and destroy it at a later date, this young one, however," he gestured at her sleeping form, in Elrond's lap, "is a creature with the most definite knowledge of the future than I have ever seen."

A gasp rippled through the room and all save Elrond instinctively leaned away from the broken girl as she let out a soft whisper of a cry. The fatherly instincts in Elrond guided him into arranging her more comfortably and hugging her close, whispering words of strength and reassurance.

0000000000000000000

Aria's Thoughts all cried out in fear before falling spell-bindingly silent as Gandalf shouted his spell and it took hold. Aria, the Heart, the True-One, the Life, froze at this, but not because of the spell. With all of the Thoughts asleep and silent, no one was there to protect the poor broken Heart. The moment of frozen realization was shattered as a Memory grabbed hold of Aria's unprotected Heart, leaving no time for reaction.

 _"_ _Cry it out, Dearest. Cry it out. I know it hurts, my love, but I must." Aria gasped for breath, the pain binding. Her soft voice whispered through and into her mind. Her twisted strange thinking seeped into Aria's head. It tortured her much more than the physical torture ever cold. She acted kind, She acted like She cared, but it was all a game to Her._

 _"_ _Take a deep breath," She commanded. "I must start again, but you must be strong." Aria bit her tongue so hard it drew blood, coppery and warm. She screwed her eyes shut as tears began to pour out. Aria just wanted Her to stop. She just wanted the pain to end, but she couldn't beg, begging never helped._

 _"_ _If you're a good girl, we can do modern trials next." She offered to Aria in her voice of honeyed poison. Aria hung limply from the chains that held her, offering no answer. "Prepare yourself, my ray." Came a soft whisper and Aria tensed on instinct. She let out a whispering cry as the medieval whip connected with the skin on her back, over and over. Her voice was gone so she could not give a proper cry, but she gave what she could. Tears poured from her eyes, she was surprised she still had water to cry out, even if it was salty._

 _Aria felt comforting arms encircle her and whisper strength and reassurance. Fear began to pulse through Aria more. This wasn't how it went! Why was it different? What could she do and what new torture was this? Never had her mind made up something new before. Her mind—on instinct—shied away from the reassurance, until Aria realized—it was in a language she didn't understand. Curiosity seized her and she focused on the feeling, however, as she began to near the surface of her mind, to awaken, her captured Thoughts surged forward, free. They instantly snuffed out the curiosity, blocking Aria from reaching the source of the sound. Pulling her back toward her self-imposed cage._

 _No! Aria, you mustn't!_ Command Thoughts shouted.

 _Leave me be! I don't want to live it again! I want to be free! He says I will be free!_ The other Thoughts didn't know what to do. It had been so long since Aria had refused their help. It had been so long that Aria has done anything period.

 _Aria! Please!_ Command Thoughts called to her, trying to console her. _Please, let us take command and you need not fear!_

Aria turned fiery rage upon her Thoughts. _No! You fought! That is why we are as weak as we are right now! No! I will take command!_ She stopped, fear building inside her. _But don't leave. I'm angry but I still love you guys. You save me and protected me._

 _We would never leave you._ Positive Thinking said softly. _We will be here as long as you need us._

 _And longer!_ Insane Thinking added brightly. Aria laughed mentally and took control of her body, willing herself awake.

000000000

I blinked as I opened my eyes. I lay in a bright room filled with light colors. I didn't get the chance to study before a beautiful dark-haired elf stepped toward me.

"You aren't supposed to be awake yet." He said worried. "Mithrandir said at least another three hours." He came closer to me. He reached out to me and I instinctively flinched. He backed a little. "I apologize. May I examine you? You hurt yourself a little back there and I need to check your wounds. I also need to check your reactions, make sure you don't have a concussion."

I studied him a moment before nodding. I watched his every move as he checks my arms, which have scratch marks on them; my cheek, also scratch marks; and my eyes, to judge the my reaction to light, I'd assume. He is one of Elrond's twins, Elladan or Elohir, I can't tell them apart, so I don't bother trying.

"You are good. I guess you did not sleep as long do to the fact that you do not originate from the world." I shrug as he backs away and goes to a small table across the room near the fireplace. He puts boiling water, from the pot over the fire, into a clay cup and crushes dried herbs in it. He comes back and hands it to me. "Here this will help the pain in your arms and sooth the nerves." Me being impervious to pretty much any pain, hadn't noticed the light stinging on my arms until he mentioned it. I shrugged and took the drink. I lifted it to my lips then stopped and pulled away. "What? Is something wrong?"

"Yes. You take a drink first." I demand and hold the cup back to him.

He frowns. "Why?"

"So I know that whatever you put in it won't hurt me." I say. I didn't exactly say it coldly or hard, but it wasn't warm and sarcastic either.

He sighs and takes a drink, then hands the cup back. I look inside to judge where the liquid had been in the cup. Satisfied that he really had taken a drink, I took on as well. As soon as it hit my taste buds, I resisted the urge to shudder. I've had some really fowl things in my life, but this beats all.

"What on earth is in this?" I ask. "And why didn't you seem affected by it?" I eye him wearily. I was sure he really had taken a drink. If he hadn't I was pretty sure I was going to throw the rest of it at him.

He shrugs, folding his arms across his chest and stares at me in a very judgmental way. "I have had more than my fair share of that stuff. It never gets better but you get used to it after the first hundred times you take it. And I do not see why you ask, you did not react any more than I did."

I glare at him and answer sarcastically. "Because I've had worse things than this shit shoved down my throat. And honestly," I continue in a more sincere voice, "everything taste better when you're taking it by choice."

His judgmental air waned and he sagged a bit. He looked away, no longer having the strength to keep eye contact. "Yeah," he agreed softly, "I guess it would."

I scowled at him, anger flaring up in me. "I don't want your false sympathy!" I snapped.

He snapped back up to look at me. "What?" He demanded. "I was not giving false sympathy!" He snapped as harshly as I had. I growled and tensed. I didn't like his tone. "I know what it's like to be hurt. Not exactly as you have, but close enough!" He threw his hands up and I couldn't help but flinch away as memories of Clara Dishma flashed through my mind. He froze when I flinched away. "I am not going to hit you." He said, horror poured from his expression. "I would never hit a female, not even a dwarf female."

"One can never be too sure." I said sharply, refusing to meet his eyes. Hurt filled his eyes, so I used the words that Commander had used on Elrond and Aragorn. "Everyone is my enemy until they prove themselves an ally. I do not and never will love those allies, I will merely tolerate them, so long as they are needed. I have never loved any creature in my life and I do not plan on starting. I have survived this long because my heart is locked away and guarded with the fiery vengeance of a greedy fire drake. None have yet succeeded in breaking it out and none ever will. I will never risk my survival for the sake of another. I have worked too hard and been through too much to risk it." My speech seemed to horrify him just as much as the thought of him hitting me. I shrug. "Take it how you will, but after you've been through what I've been through, you can't afford to love anyone. The price is too high."

He then pulled an Elrond, but I was more prepared and less robotic than my Thoughts. "Then why live, if not for love?"

"I lived because everyone wanted me to die. I stubbornly refused to give in because I had as much right as anyone to live and be free to make my own choices. Yes the price of love is too high for me to actually try to accomplish it, but that does not mean I do not yearn for it. It doesn't mean that I don't try to find happiness, or at least peace in forms other than love, or at least the love of a living being."

He stared at me. I couldn't quite tell what he was feeling, but I'd put it somewhere near understanding and pity. "That makes sense, but does it not get lonely?"

I nod. "More than you probably care to know, but it is better to be alone than surrounded by people that hurt you and hate you. At least if you're alone, you can free of pain, physical pain at least."

He surprised me by shaking his head. "No. Being alone is not the answer. I agree, do not be around those that hurt you, but it is a large world out there, just leave those people. The whole world is not composed of people determined to hurt and hate. Almost every elf I know has a heart and loves and accepts those in need. Mind you, some are prejudice against dwarves. And King Thrandruil can be a bit temperamental about humans as well, but there are many out there willing to help."

I nod. "I can accept that this may be true, however, there are not such elves in my world. In fact there are not elves at all, there is hardly magic. I'm sure there are humans in my world that are kind and caring, I may even have met a couple, but they do not stay long enough for me to heal even enough to be considered stable."

He shrugged. "Well, you are here now and perhaps that is why, aside from returning Estel and Legolas to us."

I thought about this. Perhaps it is true, perhaps even he could help me. _Aria, be careful. Don't do anything you will regret._ Subconscious' words whispered in my mind.

 _Sometimes there are risks that have to be taken in order to gain something._ I answer just as softly.

 _But if the stakes are too high…the risks too great…_

 _But they aren't. Just because I ask for help does not mean I lower my walls at the first act of kindness. If he is willing to help, he will have to earn my trust, and then my love if it ever comes to that, if he is strong enough, if he is good enough._

 _Please, Aria, be careful?_ Positive begs.

 _Yes, Aria. Ask for help, you deserve love…_ Enlightening encourage.

 _Just be careful, you're jumping off a cliff into deep the water._ Sane ended with a warning.

I laughed to them softly. _No, Sane. Not deep water, not yet anyway. We must tread softly because we don't know just how deep it is yet._

 _All the more reason to be careful, Aria._ Commander cautioned. _If it is too deep, we may never make it back to the surface._

 _But if it's too shallow, we will fall hard._ Negative finished.

 _Guys, do you not remember Shapira's words to Eragon. "Ah, but what a glorious flight it will be." We must take risks. Enjoy the flight and when we finally learn how deep the water is, then we deal with it when we get there. We have survived so much, we can just pick ourselves up and try again._

 _But, Aria._ Frightened asked, _what if we can't?_

 _Well, my little scaredy-cat, I guess we just have to risk it. Eventually we will die, whether it is in pursuit of someone to care for us or fleeing from those who seek us harm._

I turned my attention to the elf once again. He was watching me with a small smirk on his lips. "Are you quite finished with the Council Meeting, because we were talking first?" I couldn't help it, for the first time in a very long time, I laughed like there was still light in the world.

"If you got to know them, you would find the 'Council Members' are quiet wise and offer the best advice for surviving."

"I'm sure they do," he agreed, almost sarcastically, "for surviving, not living."

I wave away his comment. "Survival is all they have known so far, give them time and they will learn what it means to live."

"And do you?" He asks. I know what he means but I want him to say it anyway, so I don't answer until he clarifies. "Know what it means to live?"

I shrug. "Yes and no. I know and understand the concept, but have never actually experienced it for myself."

He began to say something, but a knock interrupted him. Before either of us could answer, an elf, identical to the one speaking to me, walked in. "El," He stopped when he noticed I was awake. "I thought Mithrandir said she was going to sleep for another three hours?"

I sit up and stare at him. "This wouldn't be the first time Gandalf is wrong, now would it?"

He nodded accepting this, then turns back to his twin. "Ada says to call for dinner as soon as she wakes up, but I guess I can tell someone to send something up, since she's already up."

The one that I'd been talking to, began to answer, but I interrupted him. "No. I don't want to eat in bed. I want to sit at a table and eat with my own hands and at my own will, whatever it is I want."

The twin at the door looked confused and even a little worried at my strange request. I growl tightly at his open looks to my questioning mental stability. Yes, I am insane, can anyone blame me after what happened? But after all I lived through, I'd never do anything short of a few scratches on myself, and that was only because two certain Thoughts decided it was a good idea to fight over control of my body, like that ever ended well.

 _I apologize, Aria. We shouldn't have fought. It was dangerous and foolish. We are supposed to be protecting you, not hurting you._ Commander gave the equivalent of a mental bow. _Please accept my apology?_

 _And mine, my Heart._ Subconscious added. _It was wrong of me to question and refuse, Commander's authority. Please accept mine apology?_

I waved their apologies aside. _We will speak of this later. The two of you are on Memory Duty, however, until I have the time._

 _Yes, my Heart._ They both answered and mentally bowed again, before departing into the depths of my dark and broken mind.

The elf near the bed that I was speaking to—thankfully—understood my needs. "Of course, I will have someone sent up to dress you more suitably and tell Ada about your desire to dine with up." He and his brother began to leave but I stopped them.

"Wait!" They both turned and looked at me as I slid out from under the sheets and stood. "Who is who?" I ask and a smiled broke across their faces.

"Elohir."

"Elladan."

So, the one I'd been having a nice heart to heart with was Elladan. That'd come in handy later. It didn't matter right now though, because they were both gone and I was alone. Well, physically. I haven't been alone mentally in a very long time, but that was good, they had helped me survive.


	4. Chapter 4 Sirya, A Kindred Spirit

Chapter 4 Sirya, A Kindred Spirit

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya. Again, I may spell things wrong and I'm sorry I'm not perfect. If I spell something wrong, like a name, let me now so I can fix it. Lastly, please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra** **-First, I'll go back and edit later. Thank you, I'm not just having her fall in love with one person. She's going to open up to Sirya, Elrond, Elladan, and Elohir(a little). And Elladan takes what he heard from Aragorn and Legolas and what his father said and just accepted hit. Later, he starts trying to get her to accept them and acknowledge them out loud. Yes, I am going to go deeper into her expirences as she opens to others and tells the various confidants about her different expirences. Thank you, Eragon and Saphira, 'nuf said. With Elladan's mentioned pain, Aria's going to help not only him, but Elohir and Elrond. She's going to help them accept that sometimes there isn't anything that can be done. Yes, when Aria didn't understand Elrond's question, I got the inspiration for her not understanding from Gaara and his lack of love growing up. Thank you for a long review.**

 **SolitaryPeak** **-Thank you, personally I like it when Aria is in control more than her Thoughts as well. I'm going to have most of the story be Aria, but when times get to hard for her, she's going to try and hand off control to her Thoughts, but they are going to get more and more distant, until she doesn't need them anymore so she can no longer hear them. I'm going to miss them when it reaches that point, but they did warn us all that they wouldn't leave until she was healed, so when she heals, they will be gone.**

I didn't speak at all through the evening meal, save a few short answers to inclinations to my health. I sat beside Erestor and a young dark-haired elf that had been with Legolas when I/my Thoughts had a major meltdown. The elf was definitely blind. He ate, talked, acted as if he was and now, when I see his eyes, I know he is. I felt no remorse, openly studying him, because he couldn't see me do it. As I watched him eat all through the meal he kept jumping at things. When the room got too loud, or when he accidentally clanked his fork or his teeth, or when Legolas—who was on his other side—accidentally jostled him.

I ignore the quizzical stares of Lord Elrond, Gandalf, Aragorn, Glorfindel, the twins, pretty much everyone on the other side of the table, as I gestured on of the servers forward.

"Can I ask you a favor?" I asked him.

He looked up nervously at Lord Elrond, who shrugged. He nodded. "Of course, my lady."

I frown. "I'm not a lady. Anyway," I pull him forward until my mouth was level with his ear. I whispered so quietly I almost wasn't saying anything. When I finished my request he pulled back and nodded.

"Of course, my lady. I shall do it myself." He bowed to me and left before I could correct him again.

 _Finally, we're getting the respect we deserve._ Insane said sarcastically.

 _Insane?_

 _Yes, my Lover?_

 _Shut up._

 _As you wish, Princess Buttercup._

 _I'm serious, Farm Boy. Shut up. Let me handle this._

 _Why are we sharing?_

 _Because this is part of taking a risk._

 _I thought we were taking a risk with Elladan. That's not Elladan. Elladan's across the table next to Aragorn and Elrond._

I sighed out loud and returned to my meal, ignoring the looks and my Thoughts—Insane Thinking in particular.

The meal commenced. Desert dishes were just being cleared away as the elf I'd sent returned. He handed me what I'd sent him to find.

"Thank you. Would you be so kind as to bring me a goblet of water?" He nodded and appeared moments later with water. I looked down at the small bottle of pills he'd given me. I twist the lid of and dump two into my hand. I set the bottle on the table and turn to the young elf beside me. I grab his hand, he flinches away from me and I instantly have Legolas's attention. I put the pills in his hand and set the goblet of water in front of him. "Here, take these. They'll help with the migraine."

He looked at me baffled and I could see Elrond in my peripheral vision, lean forward intense interest in his eyes. Legolas looked between me and the elf. "I—um—" he looked to Legolas for help. "Ada?"

I sighed exasperated. And before Legolas could answer, I did. "Listen, kid, you can't fool me. I've been watching you all meal. I can see the signs. Come 'ere." I took his face in my hands and pulled him to me. He gasped and tried to pull away. "Oh, stop it! Just let me look!" He stopped struggling but worry was etched all over his face and he was as tense as newly strung bow.

I gazed into his clouded eyes. I saw the pain flicker through them and I noticed the creases on his forehead. On instinct, I reached one hand back into his hair until I found the scar back there. He cried out and jerked away. At this Legolas rose anger in his eyes.

"What are you doing?" He demanded.

I ignored him. I grabbed the boy's hand again. "Oh, quit being a baby!" I snap as he tried to pull away.

"Quit touching me!" He snapped back. I sighed and leaned forward and let his hand feel my head through my hair. I found my own scar and pulled his fingers to touch it. He froze when he felt it. "You—" I pull back and he stares at me in shock. Legolas stared at the boy with a mixture of concern and anger. "Ada, she has one too." He said softly.

I spare a brief glance as Elrond and he was staring at me intently. I didn't like the intensity of the stare, so I turned back to the boy. "Yeah, I have one too. I had to have the surgery done after my eighth home, when one of my adoptive dad's buddies decided it would be funny to knock me over the head with a whiskey bottle. I was fourteen, then." I waved away the shock of the others in the room. "It wasn't all that bad. They did the surgery at the hospital and then put me back into the Foster Care System and I was adopted by a nice couple a few thousand miles away. I never had to see that adoptive dad again."

"Your eighth home?" One of the twins asked.

"'One' of your adoptive fathers?" Glorfindel asked looking at Elrond in shock, who looked at him, then me.

"You throw out the surgery as if it were nothing. It is extremely dangerous."

"I know," I shrug, "But either or outcome would have been fine with me."

The company about the room gasped. "You wouldn't have minded death?" The elf next to me asked.

I sighed as I thought of what came after the couple in Sacramento. _It would have been a lot easier if you'd died then._ Negative said, of handedly. I nodded, both mentally and physically.

"Yeah, death would have saved me a lot of pain, it still would." I said softly. I gasp as the boy suddenly surged forward and wrapped me in a hug.

"No!" He cried. "Don't think like that! If you really are from a different world, then those people who hurt you can't get you here! You can heal here and no one can hurt you!"

I felt involuntary tears begin to slip down my face. _Would you like me to take over, our Heart?_ Commander asked. I shook my head. "Some memories never leave you." I whisper.

He pulls back. He sets the pills on the table and finds my hands. "I know. I know better than anyone here, but—" He let go of one hand and held it out for Legolas, who took it. "But, that doesn't mean you give up. My ada found me and saved me. It's not too late for you." I buried my head in my hands and sobbed, not caring that everyone was watching.

For the first time in years, I was in control of my body, not my Thoughts, and for the first time in years, I really wanted a hug. Almost like he could read my mind, Elrond came around the table and knelt before me. He wrapped his arms around me.

"We are here to help you, child." He whispered to me. "Let us help you, heal you, love you." I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tight. I'd never had what you called a nice father figure in my life, but he was very rapidly filling a quota. I cried into his shoulder for a while—I really liked his smell, whatever it was it smelt awesome. I felt someone's hands running through my hair.

"I was healed. You can be healed." The boy's voice reached me.

 _Heart, we were created by you, of you, to protect you, heal you, help you, and love you._ Subconscious started.

 _But, we are mechanical. We are artificial._ Enlightening continued.

 _You need the love of a physical form._ Positive said softy.

 _Aria, take the leap._ Commander said. There was no argument in her voice, but I had decided. It wasn't worth the risk.

 _You may take over control, Commander._ I say softly.

 _No._ She snapped. _No, I will not and neither will any of the others. Our job is to heal you as well as protect. None here hold malicious intent toward you and wish only to help. You will go through this with our help, but you are going to remain in control. You need this and we have decided that it is best._

I sighed and pulled away from Elrond. I stared at him, I knew there was sadness and fear showing in my eyes. In his, bright sterling eyes, was love and hope, and concern. I looked up at the boy, who had his head cocked in my direction, as if to sense my feelings because he could not see my eyes.

I sighed again and looked down. "It appears I have no choice but to accept your help."

Across the table one of the twins laughed. "Looks like someone lost control."

I glare at him. "For your information, I made the choice all on my own. I don't know what you mean by 'lost control'." I snapped at him.

He just laughed again. "I may be stupid sometimes, but I'm not an idiot." He stared at me dead in the eye. "This is the third personality of yours that we've seen today. You never make a single decision on your own." My eyes widen.

 _How on Earth?_ Commander asked, unease was evident in her demeanor.

I shake my head mentally. _I don't know but it's creeping me out._

"Elladan that is enough. We are to help her, not make it worse." Elrond scolded. Elladan shrugged, undeterred.

Suddenly the young elf, who kinda started this all, stood. "Come, I wish to show you something." I jumped a little at his sudden outburst. I looked at Elrond surprised.

He chuckled. "Go on. Learn to trust, little one."

I took his hand and he led me out of the dining hall/room/place. Leaving all the other company to talk about what they'd learned of me so far—they undoubtedly would, because they were all curious and probably did want to help.

"They worked." The boy suddenly said as he led me to wherever we were going. "The strange herb things you gave me." I was confused until I remembered he must have been talking about the pills. He must have taken them when I was too busy being a weakling crybaby to notice. "My name's Sirya, by the way. Sorry about forgetting my manners."

I shrug, then remember he can't see. "That's okay. I'm Aria." He nods. "Um—shouldn't I be leading you, because you're the one that can't see?" I ask as we move down hallway after hallway.

He laughed. "I know this place like the back of my hand." Just as he said it he ran into a table set against the wall on the left. I laughed as he groaned and clutched his toe that had stubbed the leg. "Okay, I admit, I don't remember what the back of my hand looks like, but usually I can get around without running into too many things."

I can't help it, I laugh. As soon as I did it, I gasped and clapped both hands across my mouth. "What?" Sirya asked, concern creeping into his voice.

"She's afraid, that's what." I turn to see the dinner entourage coming toward us, led by the twins. I could only guess by the obnoxious saunter and the haughty tone that the one who'd spoken was Elladan.

"What for?" He asked, looking in the general direction of Elladan's voice.

"I ask the same question, Aria." Elrond said stepping past his sons and placing hand on my shoulder. "It was quite beautiful, what have you to fear."

I shifted from one foot to the other, refusing to meet anyone's eyes. "It's just really strange sounding. I can count the number of times I've laughed before on one hand."

"Looks like someone needs a little fun." I gasped and jumped away with a shriek as Elladan's voice sounded in my ear. He laughed and folded his arms across his chest. "See what I mean? You're too tense. Ease up a bit, release the tension and enjoy the light of life."

Elrond doesn't say anything, just watches me for a reaction. I give it. "Sorry to burst your bubble, Princess." I snapped. "But the last time someone told me to do that, I got whipped with a metal spiked horse whip." A gasp filled the hallway and I saw Sirya take a step back toward the wall, in my peripheral vision. "I believe her exact words were, 'They tear more muscles when you're tense. Release the tension. Revile in the pain and before you know it, you'll be begging me for more.'" I couldn't help the tears that poured from my eyes as I recalled the time. The pain never did leave, in fact I still remember the feeling and my back aches just thinking about it.

I dropped my head and stared at the floor. I wrapped my arms around myself, desperately wanting another hug. The genius that he is, Elrond can somehow tell. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me for the second time today. I wanted nothing than to be swallowed by his warm embrace and never feel the cold or the pain again. It was so relieving.

 _Oh! Someone found something they like other than reading!_ Insane's sarcasm made me crack a smile through my tears.

 _Don't tease her, Insane._ Sane thinking reprimanded. _She likes things other than reading. She likes crying._

All my Thoughts burst out laughing. I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped me. I could feel Elrond look down at me. "I'm a lunatic." I whispered to him. He burst out laughing and hugged me tighter.

"That is okay. We could all use a little insanity every once in a while." I smiled. I pulled away from him and looked into his kind eyes for a moment, before leaping up and wrapping my arms around his neck.

"Thank you. I've never had someone to make me feel better, except myself." He laughed again.

 _Oh, and what are we, minced meat?_ Negative snapped sarcastically.

 _No, you doid. We're her. We're the 'myself' that makes her feel better._ Enlightening said, just as sarcastically. _Geeze, I can't believe I have to share a living space with you._

 _Enough, guys._ I reprimand softly. I turn to Elladan. "I'm sorry I snapped."

He shook his head. "All part of the process. Although, on second thought, I do not appreciate being called 'Princess'."

The whole entourage burst out laughing. "Oh, you deserved that one, El." His brother said punching his arm.

He shrugged. "Deserved or not, it was still mean." Then he turned and sauntered off. "Hey," He called over his shoulder to me, "wasn't Sirya taking you to see something."

This seemed to take Sirya out of his strange stupor and he jumped away from the wall. "Oh, yeah! Come on!" He floundered about for a minute until he found my hand and took off down the hallway at a dead run. I laughed a little, knowing there was no way we were going to get to where we were going without running into something and causing some serious hurt.

Oddly enough, I didn't mind all too much. The hugs I got from Elrond, the strange confidence of this blind elf, the high and mighty attitude of Elladan, they all seemed to make me feel better, about myself, my pain, my memories, my fears, and my all around seclusion. I liked the sense of openness and freedom.

 **I know this chapter was short, but I feel like it was kind of a filler. Also, I decided I was going to post early because I was late last time. I hope you enjoyed.**


	5. Chapter 5 My First Sight of Light and Be

Chapter 5 My First Sight of Light and Beauty

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. Again, I may spell things wrong and I'm sorry I'm not perfect. If I spell something wrong, like a name, let me now so I can fix it. Lastly, please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra-By Count Rogan, do you mean the guy from Princess Bride with six fingers on his right hand? And all—well, most, will be explained in the next chapter, in that which concerns the 'Cruella de Ville'.**

What Sirya wanted to show me was actually his new pony. She had been born exactly two weeks before my sudden appearance with Aragorn and Legolas, who happened to be his ada. This came as a shock to me now that I was paying attention, because in the books, Legolas didn't have a son, or a wife for that matter.

"And Ada said if I train it right, then it will always be loyal to me." I smiled as he pet the small dark horse.

"It, Sirya?" Legolas asked from behind us. The boy turned in the general direction of his father.

"Him." Legolas nodded his approval and he seemed to glow with happiness and pride at his son. He began to say more when an elven woman with auburn hair, silver eyes, and a pale complexion stepped into the stables.

"Legolas! Sirya, is here to rest, not spend his time with horses!" Before Legolas could answer, Sirya did for him.

"I am sorry, Naneth. I wanted to show Aria my new pony." Sirya reached for me and I helped him find my wrist so he could pull me into view of the auburn-haired elf. She looked me up and down, her gaze showed disapproval.

"Baineth," Legolas began, "This is Aria, she helped Aragorn and I return. Aria this is Baineth, Sirya's mother."

I couldn't stop my eyes from widening. _Wow, I didn't know Legolas got married._ Negative said impressed.

 _And had a kid._ Positive added.

"It's nice to meet you." She merely nodded at me and took Sirya's hand and began to lead him away. Sirya allowed her to but kept a hold of my wrist dragging me along too.

"Aria, you must tell me of your world. What is it like there? Where do you live? What are the elves like? How old are you? What kind of magic to you do? How did you—"

"Sirya," Baineth reprimanded. "She can't possibly have time for that." I felt a flash of heat fly through my body. She'd heard of my strange breakdowns and different personalities, thanks to my Thoughts, and—

 _You're welcome, Heart of all Hearts._ Insane said sarcastically.

 _Insane, I wouldn't mind if you didn't interrupt my thinking._

 _She doesn't like us does she?_

 _No._

 _Why?_

 _Because we are weird and she doesn't want that around her son._

 _Why?_

 _She's probably afraid we'll hurt him or rub off on him, or something like that._

 _Why?_

 _I DON'T EF-ING KNOW WHY, INSANE! DOES IT LOOK LIKE I READ MINDS!_

 _No._

 _Good. Then shut up and maybe we can figure out the answer to all your '_ whys'.

"Actually, I wouldn't mind spending time with Sirya. Even I don't tell him about my world."

Baineth looked like she was ready to strangle me. "Whether you have time or not, Sirya needs to relax and I doubt he will find that with you."

It takes a bit to get under my skin, I mean after what happened, I don't get mad easily—Commander and Subconscious do, but not me. However, this lady was well on her way to getting me royally ticked off.

I smile sweetly. "Well, what's more relaxing than a good story?" Then I got a wonderful idea. I didn't have to convince her I had to convince Sirya. He would probably listen to everything his mother said with only minimal protest, but if he wanted to hear my stories bad enough, he'd cause her no end of trouble.

I stop walking and Sirya does too, causing Baineth to as well. I bend until I'm Sirya's level. "Don't you want to hear about my world, Sirya? My world, were the people go about in metal machines that don't need horses to move. Where these horseless machines give off lights that dazzle the eyes that are more beautiful than any star. Don't you want to know of Christmas and the trees full of lights that flash on and off in a magnitude of colors that you can get lost in the bright depths, and ignore the terror and the evil of the world? Wouldn't you want to hear of the buildings so high they look like man-made mountains, and when you stand at the very top, you feel the cold wind kiss your face and you feel like you're the only one in the great wide world?"

Sirya's eyes widened as I described cars, Christmas, and Skyscrapers. He nodded mesmerized. "You've seen those things?" He asked softly.

I smiled. "Yes, and more. Don't you want to hear the stories of my world?"

He nodded eagerly and turned to his mother. "I don't want to rest, I want to listen to Aria's stories of her world and her magic." He turned back to me. "How do the machines move without horses? Why do they, do you not have horses in you world?"

I laughed. "All in good time, will your questions be answered." I look up at Baineth and I am quite certain the only thing standing between me and her strangling me was Sirya. She glared at me, but then looked up and her face softened as someone came up behind me.

Sirya ran around me and into that someone's arms. "Ada! Aria's going to tell me all about her world! Did you know, the people don't use horses? They use metal machines that have bright lights that are more beautiful than stars!"

Legolas looked at me disbelieving and I smiled. That may not have been how he'd seen modern-day earth, but I had my moments in it. "My descriptive abilities are unparalleled."

He frowned. "Were you lying to him?" He asked and Sirya frowned as well, looking hurt. We all knew he'd seen my world

"No!" I snapped. "I would never lie to a child. You know what a car is!"

"That isn't the impression I got when I saw and rode in one."

I smirked. "I can make it sound as beautiful and as appealing if I want to."

He eyed me before turning back to Sirya. "It sounds fascinating, I would like to listen as well, if you don't mind me interrupting your date?"

Sirya nodded. "Of course you can listen too, Ada, so can Nana." I saw a smug look flash across Baineth's face at being included. I just shrugged, she was finding trouble where there wasn't any.

 _Actually, when you thing about it Heart of my Heart, you can cause a lot of trouble when you want to._ Commander said offhandedly.

I smirked and sauntered up the steps of the Last Homely House, the family of elves following me. She was right.

0o0o0o0o0o

We all sat in a very nice sitting room with two fireplaces, both had a fire going, a door and a balcony/window. Aside from that the furniture consisted of a large rug, three couches and two armchairs creating a semi-circle around one fire. Another couch in the corner between the door and second fire place and a small decorative table near the door. The rest of the room was bare.

The 'we' consisted of Legolas, Sirya, and Baineth; Elrond, Elladan, and Elohir, we ran into them as soon as we got into the building and they wanted to come; the five hobbits, Bilbo included, they love stories and somehow found out and decided to join; Gimli and Gloin, we ran into them in the corridor with the hobbits and apparently dwarves like stories as well; Glorfindel, Aragorn, Arwen, and Erastor, don't ask me how they knew, cause I don't know, they just showed up; and last, Gandalf, also don't know how he knew, he just showed up too. We actually ran into Boromir, but he deemed it beneath him to join.

I looked around at them, all eyes were on me. _This is making me uncomfortable._ Insane said.

 _It'll be alright, Insane. They are here to help us._ I answer, truth be told I was feeling slightly uncomfortable too.

 _Why?_

My attention suddenly turned completely to him. _We already went through this, Insane._

 _Did we?_

I sighed and pushed Insane's question from my mind. "Were to begin?" I said looking around, again. Most of the elves were standing. Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Sirya were sitting on the rug near my feet. Frodo and Bilbo were sitting together on a couch with Gandalf across from where Elrond and I were sitting, together on another couch. To the right of us were Gloin and Gimli on two arm chairs and Legolas and Baineth on another couch to the right of the dwarves. Aragorn and Arwen sat on the couch between the second fireplace and the door. Glorfindel leaned on the wall between the door and the decorative table and Erastor leaned beside him on the table. The twins were leaning against the wall in the corner between the second fireplace and the balcony doors/windows.

"Why not the beginning?" Pippin asked. "That's always the best place to start, that way one knows what is going on when the middle or the end comes about."

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped my lips. "Yes, but in describing my world, there isn't any particular sequence that matters."

"What of your life?" Glorfindel asked.

I looked down and twisted my hands in my lap. _Heart of my Mind,_ Subconscious began, y _ou are not foolish enough to bring those memories to the surface are you?_

Before I could answer I felt Elrond wrap an arm around my shoulders. "You need not tell us your pain." He said softly. I looked up into his soft gray eyes and an idea dawned.

"I could tell you the first time I was going to commit suicide." I said looking around. None of the elves were disciplined enough to mask the shock they showed as my tone completely contradicted my words. The dwarves exchanged awed looks. The hobbits looked distinctly uncomfortable. And Gandalf just looked sad. I looked at Sirya, ignoring the others. "That was the first time I felt what I told you about the horseless machines." Trying to mask his alarm and fear, he nodded. I caught a glimpse of Baineth's face and it didn't look like she liked where I was going with this. I ignored her and began.

"It was December and I was twelve years old. I was in my eighth home, counting the one I had with my birth-mother. My foster father had returned home with many of his friends after a long night of drinking. I had just received a beating for not cleaning up after one of them made a mess because he didn't know how to hold his beer." I looked down at the pale silk of my elven dress.

"After he beat me, he pushed me out of the house and said as punishment I would have to sleep in the cold." I didn't look up to see any reactions. I didn't care I just wanted to get past the pain and talk about the beauty of this memory. I took a deep breath.

"I already told Sirya this, and both Aragorn and Legolas know what I am talking about, but in our world we don't travel using horses. We have metal machines that run on fire that take us around anywhere that we need to go. These machines can move at blinding speeds, faster than any horse. At night when it gets dark, we can turn on lights on the front and back of the machines so other machines can see us and we can see the other machines."

I stopped and looked up. Everyone was staring at me in awe. I went on. "We build special roads for the machines and bridges over those roads for machines going the perpendicular direction." I looked over at Elrond. He gave me a reassuring smile when he saw the fear in my eyes. He nodded. I continued.

"As soon as my foster father had slammed the door shut, I took off running. I was done. I was sick of the pain. I was sick of never being loved and everyone always looking at me like I was some sort of disgusting disease. I couldn't take any of it anymore. My life had been nothing but hurt and rejection and I saw no reason in continuing, because all I saw in my future was more pain, fear, and rejection. I was unloved and I wanted to leave it all behind." The elves looked truly pained at my feelings when I was only twelve, the dwarves looked very angry, and the hobbits looked ready to cry.

"I ran until I saw the bridge that was fifty feet or so, above the rushing metal machines. I went up onto the bridge and sat down on the edge overlooking the machines fly past below me at lightening speeds." I looked at them all. I smiled in pure joy, remembering the memory.

"I was too afraid to look down at first, but when I did I saw the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen in my short and dark life." I closed my eyes and remembered. "The night was dark and the city was lit up with the bright lights of busy people. The stars were outshone, and could not be seen, but it didn't matter. I looked down and in the black of the night I saw thousands of machines flying below me. They were so close and so fast that their lights blended together into long continuous lines of white and red. They were bright and mesmerizing. They drowned out the dark night and the pain they were the only thing that mattered. I sat and stared as they moved on and on for hours, never ending."

Then for Sirya's sake. "The white was light a shooting star that had decided to shot across the ground instead of in the sky, and the red was the opposite in it all but equally bright and beautiful. The black road was the background and as I sat high above I could feel the wind the machines created as they flew past below. I could hear the constant hum as they continued on and on."

I opened my eyes and looked directly at Elrond. "It was the first time in my overly long life that I had seen or felt anything so beautiful. I saw light and beauty in what had almost been my death. I went back there whenever I felt like I wanted to die, because if it could save me once it could save me again."

I saw tears spring into the sparkling gray eyes of the elf lord. He pulled me forward and wrapped his arms around me. I hugged him back. When he let me go, I looked around at my audience. They all had mixtures of shock, horror, awe, and down-right fascination.

"I have had a less than perfect life, but even I had love." Gloin said, horror in his face.

I chuckled darkly. "Yes and the imperfection in your life came from that of war. What makes my pain so terrible is that for the most part, there was no war going on, and yet I was so hurt and broken, even by the age of twelve that I wished for death, because I hopped that it stop what I was forced to feel."

"My ada beat me." My head whipped away from the dwarf's face to stare at Sirya. Baineth gasped and the other elves exchanged perplexed looks. I looked at Legolas in utter surprise.

His face darkened and if he could I'm certain he would have killed me right then. "Not me! He is adopted, his birth-father hurt him!" His voice was venomous and it made my blood boil.

 _Did he just—_ Negative started.

 _He just—_ Positive didn't get the chance to answer.

"I was not looking to you as if it were you!" I snapped. "I looked to you for explanation!" _I'm doing it._ I snapped to my Thoughts.

 _What?_ Commander exclaimed. _You can't._

 _She can._ Subconscious defended.

 _She's gonna, either way._ Enlightening stated, and I did.

"I may not know every little detail and every single story, but I know you and your life, Legolas Greenleaf!" I snapped at him. "I not only know your past, but I know your future!" Siyra's announcement was forgotten as the room erupted at my proclamation. As the chaos that I had caused ensued, one thing caught and held my attention.

In his darkness, Sirya could not see what was going on and was too lost to find comfort as the world erupted in angry shouts around him, so began to cry softly. I saw the dwarves stand and begin to argue with Legolas and the twins and without knowing it, Gloin backed into the still sitting Siyra. He lost his balance and began to fall on the poor elfling, but suddenly I was there.

I'm not sure how I did it, but all I know is, one moment I'm sitting where I had started and the next, I'd shoved Gloin forward with all my strength and pulled Sirya protectively in my arms.

The whole room went dead silent. Frightened and still not knowing what was going on, or even who I was, Sirya wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in the crook of my neck. Legolas knelt to take him, but I decided to give him the attention he had let me know he wanted when he admitted to his own painful life.

"Sirya?" I asked softly. "Why don't you tell me, about your other ada?" Legolas automatically tensed and I heard a few sharp gasps.

"His name was Herenvarno." I nod.

 _Do we even know, Mother's name?_ Frightening asked. I was momentarily distracted at the question.

 _No, I don't think we do._

 _We know Madame's name don't we?_ Positive asked.

I felt shock from all of the Thoughts. _Do we?_ Felt a cold flash of fear sweep through me as we all accidentally thought of Her at the exact same time. I don't know if Sirya said something else, but before I couldn't control myself anymore I shoved Sirya off my lap. I didn't want him to be hurt.

I screamed as She suddenly became all I could see. She smiled kindly at me, Her fake honey smile. Her biggest lie to me. _"Come, Aria, it's time to start again."_

 _"_ _NO!"_ I couldn't do this again. Even the memories were too much to live through again. I screamed again as I blacked out and my memories took hold and began to form my twisted black dreams. I lost contact with Middle Earth and the elves that had promised to heal me. In a terrified and blackened thought, _you can't heal something that's dead._

 **Sorry about another short chapter, but I'm going to start explaining what happened at Aria's tenth home. It'll explain when her voices came around, how she survived, escaped, and what 'Cruella' herself is like. Although I can't decide if I'm going to name her or just leave her as She or 'Cruella'. Review and give me ideas. Also, I changed the rating of my fanfic because I realized there is going to be some really terrible and slightly twisted violence.**


	6. Chapter 6 It's a Dream

Chapter 6 It's a Dream.

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it. I will try to keep it to one chapter, so if anyone wants to skip they can.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, and sweetdixie.17**

 _It's a dream._

 _It's a dream._

 _And I know this._

 _But that's what makes it worse._

 _It was a dream._

 _But She was in control._

 _She always was._

 _The Pain._

 _The Torture._

 _She was in control._

 _Even a whole world away._

 _She was that one demon that was so powerful it could follow you to Heaven._

 _Devil, that one demon is called a devil, or the Devil._

 _This was the truth._

 _She was the devil._

 _In the skin of a human woman._

 **It's short but for effect. Sorry, there's more than one chapter of this 'dream.' I'll be updating the chapters of the 'dream' one after another, only one day apart. Thank you Mirkwood Warrior for letting me know about the mess up and I'm sorry I didn't notice.**


	7. Chapter 7 The Art of Pain and Torture

Chapter 7 The Art of Pain and Torture

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it. I'm sorry, but I can't limit the torture to one chapter, I will give you the chapter numbers that have it in them.**

 **Chapter 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and maybe 12**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, and sweetdixie.17**

 **Italics is the dream, not italics is when Aria is half asleep and can see and talk to the elves taking care of her, times new roman font and third person is reactions to Aria's freak-out session and now forced-comatose-dream-like-state and her screams from said dream-like-state.**

 _"_ _Dearest Love?" Her voice was like ice, beautiful but cold with the promise of pain. I opened my eyes. It was a dream, but I still couldn't help the fear that pulsed through me at the sight of Her. She wasn't bad to look at, quite the opposite, she was quiet beautiful, but after all the pain…There was no after. Simply the memory of what happened made my body remember, make it burn and scream in pain as if She were still beside me._

 _"_ _This is the Art of Pain and Torture, it is for the sake of science, so be as honest as you can. You are my fourth and last test subject needed before I can publish my findings. So please forgive me if I rush a bit, but I need this done quickly and as soon as possible."_

 _I struggled against the straps that held me to the steel chair. No! No! No!_ _This couldn't be happening! No! I can't do it again! I can't live through it again! "Please! No! I can't do it! Don't do it again! Please!" I couldn't see as the tears blurred my vision._

 _I feel a small connection to my actual body and I can tell that I'm not alone and that I'd called out loud, but as I tried to pull myself out of the dream, the memory, She came toward me._

 _"_ _No, child. Do not cry, it is for the best. Hold still and it will hurt less." She stuck a needle in my arm and pushed something lime green into me. I knew it wasn't happening but my body didn't listen to my brain. It remembered the pain of needles. It remembered the pain of the lime green liquid._

 _My body, both my dream one and physical one in Middle Earth, seized up. I began to struggle as my body began to send intense pain signals to my brain. I screamed as it felt like my blood had become liquid fire, burning through my veins._

 _I screamed and cried and begged for Her to stop, but she just watched me, occasionally taking notes. I could kind of sense the movement and fear and confused hurrying about my physical body as the elves tried to figure out what was wrong with me._

 _Where were my Thoughts? "Guys! I need you! Please, you said you would protect me! I need you! Please! Plee—" I cut off and scream again as the dulling pulse of pain suddenly flares up like fire exposed to gasoline. I scream again, struggling against my bonds._

 _"_ _NO!_

 _"_ _Please!_

 _"_ _I can't live through it again!_

 _"_ _Stop!"_

 _I scream again as She gives me yet another dose. I have no brain power to spare on plees. All I can do is scream and struggle as my healing heart and mind slowly rip apart at the seams. All mental stability left, all desire to leave, heal, and be free._

 _All I wanted was death, but death was the one pain that I wanted, but couldn't have._

 **I know the chapters are short and kinda sad, but please bear with me. I have to break it up for effect and there has to be a wound before it can heal. I'll show everyone's reaction to Aria either in chapter 8 or 9.**


	8. Chapter 8 Fire and Ants

Chapter 8 Fire and Ants

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, and sweetdixie.17**

 **KomiXO-Sorry for not acknowledging that you too, said something about the messed up chapter, I didn't read the review until later. Thanks for the review.**

 **Italics is the dream, not italics is when Aria is half asleep and can see and talk to the elves taking care of her, times new roman font and third person is reactions to Aria's freak-out session and now forced-comatose-dream-like-state and her screams from said dream-like-state.**

 _I released my tensed muscles as the pain ebbed away. I was panting hard and sweating. My hair was plastered to my wet face and I couldn't tell if it was physical or a memory. She stood from the desk and came around and sat at a chair near mine._

 _"_ _That was very good, dear, very good. Now, as accurately as you can, will you describe it to me?" She pushed some of Her black hair behind Her ear. She stared at me expectantly._

 _I glared at her. "Go back to Hell!" I snapped. She nodded and wrote something on the clipboard She had with her._

 _"_ _Something similar each time. Anything else, dear?"_

 _I clenched my eyes shut and tried to concentrate on my physical body. I could hear something going on, but before I could pull myself awake, She started again. "Very well." She took a purple liquid and inserted it into the same place on my arm. "Let's see if you can tell the difference between this and the first."_

 _I didn't have time to tense. I screamed as I felt the liquid run through my veins like an army of ants. It felt like a million little feet were running all up and down me and my heart rate increased of its own accord. Then the hallucinations set in._

 _I saw the ants and all I wanted was for them to be gone. I tried to brush them off and started crying as they began crawling up my arms. I cried as they reached my head, then the stings started._

 _I screamed and flailed as best I could. I wanted them off. I screamed and my body became red and flushed. I screamed and finally broke the bonds holding me in the chair._

 _I felt both my physical and dream body hit a stone floor. I cried out as a new pain shot through my head. I tried to stand and push the ants off. Through my blurred vision I saw Her stand and come toward me and through the illusion, the dream, I also saw Elrond._

"Aria. Please, wake. It is a dream."

 _"_ _Don't struggle, Love. It makes it worse."_

 _I cried. I want to go to Elrond, but She was there. I wanted him to hold me but I couldn't see past Her._

"I know! I know! Wake me up! I don't know how! I don't know how!"

 _"_ _It is no dream, child. It is real. Let us go again." The sight of Elrond faded and She became solid._

 _"_ _NO! STOP!" I struggled to get away from me. "DON'T TOUCH ME! LEAVE ME ALONE!" She advanced and caught me._

 _"_ _Don't struggle." She dragged me back to the chair and bound me in tighter. "One more and then we can talk." She inserted a bright red liquid and I started crying before She even pushed it in. This one could accurately be described as Hell in a liquid form._

 **I hope I did her pain justice. I know it may be confusing but I'm going to try and explain it all. Merry Christmas everybody.**


	9. Chapter 9 The Scream

Chapter 9 The Scream

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, and KEZZ 1**

 **Italics is the dream, not italics is when Aria is half asleep and can see and talk to the elves taking care of her, times new roman font and third person is reactions to Aria's freak-out session and now forced-comatose-dream-like-state and her screams from said dream-like-state. Also, when the points of view change, there is a little bit of an overlap.**

Elrond sank to the floor shaking. He leaned against the bed where she lay, refusing to meet anyone's eyes. His children, the other healers, none had seen him look so defeated and lost. He looked up at her. She had finally stopped flailing and screaming only moments ago. She was covered in sweat and her dark hair was plastered to her face. She looked like she was only sleeping, but instead of being serene, she looked tense and afraid.

He tensed when he felt Arwen place a hand on his shoulder. "It's not you, Ada." She said softly. "Even you cannot know every kind of wound." He finally looked up at the light of his life. She knelt beside him and hugged him close.

He smiled sadly. "You always know—" They all jumped as Aria screamed again and began to thrash about, trying to rid her skin of something only she could see. Elrond jumped to his feet and Elladan and Elohir jumped forward to hold her down as she thrashed about crying. She struggled, then paused a moment and started to scream as if she was being eaten alive. She thrashed trying to get the invisible invaders off.

Suddenly Aria's arm broke away from Elladan, catching his chin and knocking him off balance into Elohir. Unable to hold her down by himself, Elrond lost control of her and she tumbled off the bed, slamming her head on the stone floor.

She cried out in pain, then tried to stand still brushing herself wildly, crying for mercy. Then her eyes opened and the glazed gray caught Elrond, who'd hurried around the bed to her.

"Aria. Please, wake. It is a dream." He called to her desperately. She began to cry harder.

"I know! I know! Wake me up! I don't know how! I don't know how!" Her frantic cried filled the air as she tried to battle her way into consciousness. Then her demeanor changed and her eyes closed again. She collapse and Elrond caught her.

Back in her nightmares she tried to fight him and pull away. "NO! STOP!" I struggled to get away from me. "DON'T TOUCH ME! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Elrond laid her back on the bed, his heart heavy with fear and helplessness. She was quietly crying when Gandalf entered. "What news?"

Elrond shook his head defeated. "She saw me, but only for a moment, then her nightmares took her again." Elrond brushed a shaking hand through his hair. None in the room had ever seen him so broken, aside from Gandalf and his children. Arwen went to her brothers. The last time they'd seen their father like this had been when he could not heal their mother and she had to sail.

"Perhaps—"

Whatever Gandalf had been about to say was drowned out by the most unearthly scream they'd ever heard. Every elf in Rivendell fell to their knees with their hands over their sensitive ears as Aria screamed with so much pain it was a wonder she was still alive. The humans, dwarves, hobbits, and the odd wizard also clutched their ears, but not from sensitivity, but with the desire to block out the hellish scream.

Even as she screamed, Aria began to claw herself, dragging her nails up and down her body, drawing blood. Elladan ignored the stabbing pain in his ears and jumped onto the bed, straddling Aria's hips. He grabbed her arms and held them above her as tight as he could and used his feet to keep her legs down so she couldn't throw him off.

He held her there as she screamed, involuntary tears streaming down his face. It felt as if someone was driving an ice-cold spike through his ears and into his head. Elladan looked down at Aria's face trying to concentrate on anything but the pain, when suddenly she stopped screaming.

The silence was both deafening and relieving. Elladan released Aria and clutched his poor ears. There was blood streaming from both of them and Elladan couldn't hear a thing. The elves in the room stood and looked around confused. Gandalf looked very tired as he sagged against the door.

"How?" Arwen asked as she came closer to the bed to look at the girl Elladan was still sitting on. Elladan looked over at her, his face a mask of pain. "Elladan, what's wrong?" She asked, worried. Had she hurt him?

Elladan couldn't hear her, but he knew what she was asking. He pulled his hands away and she gasped. "Ada! Elladan's ears!" Elrond looked up from the healer he was talking to and Elohir turned. Both cried out in shock.

"Why were they not covered?" Elohir asked in shock as he ran to his twin. Elladan shook his head and pointed to his ears, his face was now both pain and terror. He couldn't hear anything but the ringing of Aria's scream.

Before anything more could be said and done, just as suddenly as it had stopped, Aria's unearthly scream pierced the air again. All the elves cried out in pain and crumbled, their hands over their ears. Elladan instantly leapt back into his original position as Aria began to struggle once more. He was glad that he no longer had to hear her screams, but terrified that his hearing would never come back.

 **Tell me what you think about this chapter. I'm not going to have Elladan loose his hearing, so don't worry, I'm mean, but not that mean. Also I'm sorry it took so long to update, I thought I'd already put this chapter up, but I guess not. As compensation, I'm putting up chapter 10 as well. Thanks again to all you guys that are reviewing, it's encouraging.**


	10. Chapter 10 And Through the Pain I Saw a

Chapter 10 And Through the Pain I Saw a Light

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, and KEZZ 1**

And through the pain I saw a light.  
It was beautiful, happy and bright.  
When I saw it, I felt it too.  
I felt it and the nightmares flew.  
They flew away, into the night,  
Taking my darkest dreams, in their flight.

I looked again, but the light was gone.  
Was it a dream, or was I moving on?  
Was I going to leave, this torturous world behind?  
Leave the love and light I had only begun to find?

I closed my eyes in my dark world, no longer full of dreams.  
What was happening? Nothing was ever as it seems.  
I took a deep breath and opened my eyes.  
To my surprise, the light was there shining like a star in the skies.

This light was a man, no not a man, an elf.  
He smiled, "Come, you can save yourself."  
I took the hand he held out for me.  
He led me away to where I was free.

I was free of the dreams, of the darkness of night.  
I was free of the pain, I no longer had to fight.  
He brought me back to the world of love.  
He set me free to fly in the light from above.

"You don't have to remember, you don't have to fight.  
"Follow your heart and follow the light."  
I looked into his eyes of sterling gray.  
"Will I ever see the day,  
"When I am truly free,  
"When none can hurt or control me?"

I saw in his eyes a great sadness.  
"I am sorry, but in this world grows a madness.  
"It is great and terrible. It will makes your darkness stronger.  
"You may need to leave, before you can fight it no longer."

My heart felt heavy and I looked away.  
What should I do? What should I say?  
"Is there a way, stop this madness?  
"Is there any end to this sadness?"

"Yes, there is a way, but it is hard and dangerous."  
I smile, but it is sad and strenuous.  
"I remember now. The hobbits have a hard road to go."  
"Not just hobbits, you know?"

"Of course, every race on Middle Earth,  
"Must join in the fight for home and hearth.  
"But what of me, what can I do?  
"I am broken and hurting to.  
"I would be little help to those who fight.  
"My soul is broken and as dark as night."

 **I know the poem was a sudden change, but I felt it was necessary, also I was kind of in the mood. The poem isn't actually telling what happened next, but a little is similar. If you want the whole poem, pm me and I'll give you the whole thing. Happy New Years to all and again, sorry it took so long to update.**


	11. Chapter 11 The Promise of Light

Chapter 11The Promise of Light

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, and**

 **KEZZ 1-I know technically your first review was chapter eight, but I didn't get the chance to personally welcome you. Thank you for reading my story. Also thanks for letting me know about the glitch.**

 **KomiXO-Thank you also for telling me. And Welcome as well, I hope you like my story.**

 **Italics is the dream, when it goes back to normal, she's awake for good.**

 _I couldn't stop the screaming pain coursing through me. I couldn't see anything. I couldn't hear anything. I was lost in the pain that I thought I'd never have to feel again. I felt like I was screaming, but I couldn't hear it. I tried to dig out the poison inside me, but I wasn't sure that was how it worked, I couldn't remember. All I knew what the pain. It was as if the lava of Mt. Doom was coursing through me like blood, burning every bit of me._

 _Mt. Doom. Where do I know that name? Where did it come from? I didn't know. I couldn't remember. The pain blocked it all._

Lord of the Rings. _I heard the answer from somewhere deep inside me._

 _Lord of the Rings? I strained through the pain._

Yes. Lord of the Rings. Written by J.R.R. Tolkien.

 _Who is J.R.R. Tolkien? Who are you? How are you making the pain go away? It was going away. I could hear this voice. I couldn't feel myself screaming anymore. I couldn't contact my physical body, but it didn't hurt._

 _Physical body. Isn't this my physical body?_

I'm not making the pain go away. I'm giving you something to concentrate on, so you can block it out. You are in a dream, so your physical body is your actual body, not a dream.

 _Why? How?_

You've done this before, Aria. You've been through this pain before, what you are feeling now is just a memory of that.

 _How?_

Because you were hurt so bad that every detail of the memory is remembered.

 _Shouldn't it be opposite, I was hurt so bad I don't remember the actual pain?_

No, because if you forgot about the pain then the constant fear of feeling it again would be gone and this would protect you from what you are experiencing now.

 _And what am I experiencing?_

 _The voice sighed._ A memory. I already said this.

 _Who are you?_

I am you. A part of your mind.

 _I'm confused._

I never thought very much into how I came to be, or the others. It should probably stay that way, because honestly we'd probably get a headache from thinking about it.

 _Others?_

Is that all you caught?

 _Before I could answer, a dark presence entered my mind. A fiery eye full of malice and darkness. It blocked out the voice, broke my concentration, and brought the pain back. I screamed as the pain returned in full force._

 _I remembered. The presence made me remember. It was a dream. I couldn't get out. I couldn't fight it. I couldn't free myself. I felt my body. I could hear again. Then I realize, I remember somehow._

 _This wasn't a memory anymore. This was Sauron, using the darkness already inside me to break me more than I was already broken._

 _Why? I asked. I knew he was listening. I knew he was here._

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU SHOULDN'T! YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO ACT UPON YOUR KNOWLEDGE! YOU SHALL DIE, KNOWING YOU FAILED TO SAVE THOSE WHO HAD CARED FOR YOU!

 _His words seared through me and I screamed louder, if that's possible. I was giving up, I could feel my strength fading. Where were my Thoughts? Why weren't they protecting me as they had promised?_

 _I scream grew in strength, until I felt my throat finally tear. I couldn't do it alone. I never could and never had._

 _Finally I stopped. The pain was still there, it still hurt like nothing I'd ever felt before, but I didn't have strength. I relaxed my tense, pain-filled body, the pain coursed through me faster and easier, but I didn't have the strength to fight it or feel through it._

 _I released everything I could. I felt my desire to live, slip away and I felt myself fading. I felt cold seep over me and after the burning pain, the numb cold was a relief. The darkness was painful though. It terrified me and I was sick of it._

 _As if on request, a pale light began to glow before me. I began to move toward it, but for some reason it hurt. Dying shouldn't hurt. I should be able to die, that was what he wanted._

 _When the light form took shape, I realized why. It was Elladan. I don't know how I knew it was Elladan, not Elohir, but I knew._

"Aria, please, do not give in. Aria, fight the pain. Your life has been nothing but pain. Come back and fight for your freedom. Fight for your right to never feel pain again." _I stared at him for a long time. Was it worth it? Was it worth Sauron wrath? Why_ was _my life so full of pain? Why me and why not?_

 _"_ _If I come back," I stared at him. He was so beautiful bathed in light, his dark hair flying around him gently in a breeze that I couldn't feel. His gray eyes shone with fear, yet determination. His form was strong, that of a warrior. "If I come back, what is to say the pain will stop?"_

 _His eyes light with hope, I'd answered, I was listening to him._ "I cannot promise the pain will stop, we have a great evil that we are fighting, but I can promise that, to the best of my ability, I will protect you."

 _I stared at him. "You promise, you will protect me?" He nodded. I closed my eyes to him. How could I ensure that he kept his promise? "Swear to me."_

"What do you wish me to swear by?" _He seemed willing. I thought, what did I want him to swear by? Then the thought came to me. He could swear by what had brought me to Middle Earth in the first place._

 _"_ _Swear by my necklace."_

 _He nodded slowly, a little confused but still willing._ "I swear. I swear by your necklace and whatever powers it holds, that I will protect you from the pain and the darkness. I swear that I will die for you, should it save you from further pain."

 _I didn't exactly like the last part, but no sooner than he said it than the darkness began to fade. It faded and was replaced by a beautiful landscape, a beach with a really beautiful view of the sea. Elladan looked around in surprise, and I guess he hadn't anything to do with it._

 _"_ _Why?" I asked staring at him intently. Somehow I know that here, wherever we are, we can talk freely and it won't cause either of us harm and Sauron won't be able to find and/or see what was going on._

 _Elladan looks at me in return. His grey sterling eyes are beautiful and fathomless. They look young, but also hold years of hurt and pain._ "Because, we, my family may have just met you, but already you have captured my father's heart, I do not want it broken again. Because, when my mother was hurt, we couldn't heal her. We didn't know how, I feel like we failed her. With you, we now have a chance to prove ourselves and to gain our confidence and heal. Because you have every right to live and be free of the darkness that has been trying to smother your light, all of your life."

 _I stared out over the sea. "What happened? How did Sirya react? Did I hurt anyone?"_

 _Elladan shook his head._ "You passed out into your nightmares and we took you to bed before you ever started screaming or thrashing. Your screams were loud, but not excessively so, until after you spoke with Ada. Sirya's a little shaken by it all, but he'll be fine as soon as he sees you awake and not screaming again."

 _I turn my full attention to him. "You are avoiding the last question. What happened after I saw Lord Elrond?"_

 _He sighed and looked away._ "You were quiet for a moment, crying softly, but then…suddenly you just screamed…except it was…" _He paused, like he was reluctant to describe what my scream sounded like._ "It was unearthly, it drove even Gandalf to his knees. It hurt every elf's ears, but even those that hadn't sensitive enough ears, were driven to their knees at the desire to block out the fear it caused."

 _"_ _Did I hurt anyone?" I repeated, the whisper was soft, borderline broken._

 _He nodded slowly._ "A little. You began to hurt yourself, I couldn't let you do that."

 _"_ _So you held me down instead of covering your ears?" He nodded. "Is it permanent?"_

 _He shrugged._ "We don't know. You are our main concern."

 _I study him. Why was he so devoted to me? "Ever heard of soulmates?"_ _A very sarcastic voice asks, from behind me. This world wherever it was, was in my mind, in some way, and that meant my Thoughts were here to. I smiled to myself as I turn, ignoring the look of shock that spread across Elladan's face._

 _A man stood behind me with a cocky grin and a mischievous glint in his eye. He borderline resembled Captain Jack Sparrow, but at the same time was more modern insane asylum, mental hospital patient. He didn't have definite features, due to the fact that he was created in my head and I never really pictured any specific features to him._

 _I opened my arms to him and he stepped forward for a hug. "Hey, Insane."_

 _He held me tight for a moment. "I'm sorry, Aria. We all are. We messed up, bad, and you went through a lot of pain because of it."_

 _I shook my head and pulled away. "No! Normally, yes, it is your job to be there, but none of this was under our control. Yes, it started out as memory, but that was only to open the floodgates to the darkness and that was what was being sought after. Sauron was manipulating all of us, somehow. I don't blame any of you." He nodded reluctantly and I smiled, before turning back to Elladan, who was exactly as I'd left him, frozen in shock at the appearance of another._

 _"_ _Elladan, this is one of my Thoughts, Insane Thinking."_

"It is an honor to meet you…Insane Thinking." _Elladan answered with all the grace of an elven lord, but he acted very uncertain as to what exactly had happened and was going on now._

 _Insane bowed dramatically. "Pleasure is all mine." He said sarcastically, before adding a mad cackle._

 _Elladan uncertainty turned to worry and I laughed. "Don't worry, he's balanced out pretty well by the others. Speaking of which, where are the others?" I asked Insane._

 _He shrugged. "Busy, I think. It doesn't matter, they can talk to you later, what does matter, is that you need to wake up soon or we'll never be able to repair the damage."_

 _Elladan nodded in agreement._ "We do. The others will be worried and it is taking too long, they may panic." _I can't help the flutter of fear that began to flap about in my stomach._

 _"_ _How do we wake up?" I asked._

 _Elladan smiled kindly and held both hands out to me._ "Just close your eyes and let me guide you. There's nothing to it." _I nod and take his hands, closing my eyes. Insane could feel my fear—obviously—and placed a hand on my shoulder._

 _"_ _Remember what you said to us, Light of Our Lives, sometimes there are risks that have to be taken in order to gain something." I smiled, despite the dark. Insane was weird and quirky and very strange sometimes, but he was what he was, one of my Thoughts, and that meant he loved and supported me, not matter what._

 _I don't get to judge Elladan's response to Insane's words, because my closed eyes, but when he speaks, I catch a hint of amusement. Except it's more like he probably had a small smile on his face and his words were amused but also awed, kind of like when someone reacts to a fluffy part in an adventure movie._

"Keep your eyes closed until I say." _Elladan says to me and I nod. I don't know what he does or how he does it but somehow I become increasingly aware of my physical body, the sensations around me, and Middle Earth in general._

"Okay," Elladan's voice is soft. I open my eyes and the first thing I see is Elladan's eyes. They are so beautiful and perfect all I can do is stare at them, him for who knows how long. He smiles, but I notice blood trailing from both ears and it makes my stomach flutter and my cheeks flush with guilt.

I kind of hear the chaos going on around us, but at the moment all I care about is the elf leaning over me. He helps me into a seated position and as soon as he sits back away from me, I throw my arms around his neck, shocking the chaos into freezing.

I know I'm getting blood in his hair from my scratches, but I don't think he really cares as he hugs my waist back. "Thank you." I whispered into his ear. "I was so close to giving up. Thank you for coming for me."

He chuckled. "I just didn't want to see you fail because of something that even the strongest have a hard time against. And I made you a promise, now, so I will always come for you, no matter the danger."

I nod and my eyelids grow heavy and my body registers how tired it is from my mental breakdown, if that's what you can call it. So not to worry him, as I drift off I whisper in his ear. "I'm just tired. I'll wake up, I promise."

My body goes limp and my world goes black, but it is pleasantly so. I know he will be there when I wake up and my Thoughts are being more careful and more viligant than ever. I rest and sleep deeper than I thought I ever could. There were no dreams or nightmares and the blackness was more of a pale gray because of the light that I knew was there for me and I was content for the first time since Clara Dishma's basement.

I guess I do remember her name.

 **So I can't help but think this is such a cute and good ending and if I were any less of an author, reader, and good person I would so leave the story right now, but that's would be above and beyond my ability to do. As I said before I am mean and terrible to my characters, but not that mean, and I'm especially not that mean to my readers. I hope you guys liked it and if you want the whole poem from chapter 10, just let me know I have it. Sorry I took so long to update, but here it is. (After thought: I realized, I actually did name the horrendous devil in human form back in like chapter 3 when Aria's Heart first took over, but I felt like it was okay and reasonable that the Thoughts forgot and/ or hadn't thought about her name in a really long time, because their job was took keep the Memories at bay, but they were just as afraid of them as Aria, or more.)**


	12. Chapter 12 It Begins: Oh The Answers I N

Chapter 12 It Begins: Oh The Answers I Need

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: The Legolas in this story will appear fatherly and knowledgeable. This is due to the events of Hand in Hand, a fanfiction by SolitaryPeak, who has given me permission to use the newly developed Legolas and perhaps her OC Sirya, also I may deviate, I don't know yet. I also changed the rating because there will be violence, pain, insanity, and a bit of mental torture, if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read it.**

 **Please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, and KomiXO**

I opened my eyes to see light filtering in the window of my room. This is it, today's the day. December 25, the Fellowship was leaving Rivendell today, me and Elladan were going along so I could see Lady Galadriel. Everything had mellowed out after my—I don't even know what to call it, major panic attack/attempted murder by Sauron. Sirya had a bit of a scare, but after I assured him everything was okay, that I was okay, and that it wasn't his fault, we were the best of friends. Elladan always stayed close and wherever Elladan was Elohir often followed. Honestly, I think that Elohir is a little bugged that Elladan's going and he doesn't get to, or maybe he's just super worried about all the trouble we're going to run into on the road.

My Thoughts have been very diligent with little arguing. I think it's because they feel like they let me down and are trying to make it up to me. It's nice, but really quiet and it rakes on my nerves sometimes. Elladan—I don't know how—always seems to know when I need some company. He takes it upon himself to entertain me by taking me on walks, teaching me to use a sword, bow and arrows, or double knives, or showing me all the wonders of the Imlardis library, or introducing me to friends. It's strange how kind he is and—I admit it—I have small panic attacks when he does anything particularly kind, or when Lord Elrond acts like the father I never had. I can't help it and as open-minded as I am, I still can't help but NOT understand the concept, even if the misunderstanding is just a moment long.

And poor Elladan. Yes, he's helping me—that's his job—but the poor elf was deaf because of my screaming for the rest of October and the better part of November. He wouldn't hear of me being guilty, but that was of course the point, because he couldn't hear at all for a while. Arwen and Elohir had a good laugh when I pointed this out and I couldn't help but feel better after that, because that was just how the Elrond children worked.

I roll out of bed and dawn a dark tunic and leggings that Arwen had given me the night before—thank goodness, I was getting sick of wearing dresses—and a really nice pair of dark, lace-up, knee-high, leather boots. My pack was already all packed and ready to go, everything provided for by Lord Elrond and Arwen—I had a minor panic attack when they presented the stuff to me, and ended up crying in Lord Elrond's arms.

 _Wow, I can't believe we're finally leaving._ Insane said. I smiled, he's the most vocal out of all of them, since the attack—of whatever kind it was.

"Come in." I answer to the knock that sounds on my door, just as I began lacing my boots.

The door opened and Arwen's dark head appeared. "Good, you're already up. I was sent up to make sure you're ready."

I smiled to her. "Come on in. I'm putting on my boots, then I'll be done." She slipped in and sat on the bed beside me. She smiled at me in return, but her eyes were sad.

"You know I'm from a different world." I said as I pulled on my second boot and began lacing it up.

 _Woah, Aria!_ Commander suddenly exclaimed, it took everything I had not to jump at how loud it seemed. _Be careful what you tell her, it could change things._

 _No, not really. All that would change is her fading. She doesn't have contact with the Fellowship, at all._

"I know. You brought Legolas and Aragorn back."

I nodded. "Pretty big of me to abandon my own world to help to weird strangers return to theirs, huh?"

She stared at me funny. "Well, you weren't exactly happy." She answered, confused and a little wary about where I was going with this.

 _I'm confused and a little wary about where you're going with this._ Sane said sarcastically.

 _Shut up, Sane. I'm working._ "No, my life wasn't happy, but when I found or ran into Aragorn and Legolas, I was fairly content."

She frowned. "So you had some ulterior motive?" She asked.

I shook my head. "Not quite."

 _Yeah, that's a good point. Why did you agree to help them, Commander?_ Positive asked. _It's not like you knew how._

 _I don't know. I just had a feeling, besides, we couldn't exactly leave Aragorn and Legolas, THE Aragorn and Legolas on the side of the road lost._

 _She has a point, but Our Heart of Hearts doesn't. Aria, what are you getting at? I'm lost, I didn't even know you were paying attention all the way back then._ The Thoughts stirred with curiosity at Enlightening.

I sigh mentally. _I'm always listening—no, I lied, I'm not all the time, but I do a lot of the time. I never had anything else to do. But you guys are distracting, you'll see what I'm getting at._

"What are you getting at, if you didn't have some ulterior motive? Why bring it up?" Arwen asked, getting frustrated.

 _My thoughts exactly!_ Enlightening exclaimed.

I chuckled. "My point is, did it ever occur to you that I might have known who I was dealing with, without them ever knowing I knew?"

Arwen's eyes widened in surprise. "You did say something about knowing Legolas better than he knew himself, back right before your attack…thing! We were all distracted so soon after, all of us forgot about it!"

I nodded. "I knew who Aragorn and Legolas were. I know who you and Lord Elrond are. I even know about Gandalf and Lady Galadriel. I know all of you guys and most of your pasts and all of your futures."

Arwen's eyes turn from surprised to frightened. "Our futures?"

I nod. "Not just glimpses either, I know your futures and everything that leads up to them…all the way until you die." I added the last part as a sort of after-thought.

"Die?!" She exclaimed, the fear building. She stood and moved toward the door, but I beat her to hit, blocking her way out. She's an elf—even if she happens to be a very feminine one—so I have no doubt she could move me if she really wanted to, but I think she secretly wants to hear what I'm trying to say.

"Yes die, after a nice long life with Aragorn." Realization dawned on her face.

"That's what you were getting at? You are trying to make me feel better!"

I nodded and smiled. "You die, but because you decide to live a human life with Aragorn."

She nodded. "I did choose that."

"And I'm telling you that you live a long life together."

"So he doesn't die?" She asked. And I nodded. "He survives the destruction of the ring?" I nodded again. "And it is destroyed?" I nod for a third time. "What about the rest of the Fellowship?"

This time I shook my head. "I can't tell you or anybody else how, but I can reassure you by saying that he survives."

She looks down and nods. "I understand. I was a fool to ask. It is dangerous to know—" She cut off and looked up at me. "Your attack! It wasn't just because of your past! It's because of Sauron! Isn't it?!"

I shrug and give her a cocky smile. "Maybe."

"He knows you know the future!" I just stare at her with my head cocked to one side and my eyebrow raised. She frowned. "You need to tell Ada and Mithrandir! They need to know and so does **Daernaneth**!" I sigh and she throws me an amused look. "And you need to practice on your making-someone-feel-better skills."

I laughed. "I know. I'll tell Gandalf as soon as we're on the road."

"What about Ada?"

"You can tell him."

She shook her head. "No, it's you who knows, so you need to tell him."

"Fine, I'll tell him right before we leave." I paused. "What about Elladan?" I asked her.

She tilted her head confused. "What about him?"

"Well he is there just to protect me, does he need to know too?"

Arwen looked down and played with her nails. "I don't know, ask Ada and Mithrandir if you should."

I nodded and started to say something, but lost my train of thought when a knock sounded on the door—right next to my ear! "Holy Valar of Middle Earth!" I jumped away and backed into Arwen, who burst out laughing when we both tumbled to the floor.

"Come in!" She called from where we were on the floor.

Elladan and Elohir appeared in the now open doorway. "Nice language, Ria." Elladan said sarcastically. "What are you two doing on the floor?"

I grinned at him. "We're looking for quarters, and my 'nice language' could have been a lot more colorful, except you're determined to make me at least a decently behaved woman."

"Decently behaved?" He exclaimed exasperated. "I thought we were going for lady?"

I shrugged and stood, offering Arwen a hand up. "I don't know about you, but I think lady is shooting for the stars, if we miss I'd be left drifting in the black nothingness of space, so we better not."

We all burst out laughing. "Come on, Ri. We're leaving." I nodded and shouldered my pack. Arwen reached out and took my hand. I looked down—I admit—I'm a little surprised at the contact. She led me out of the room.

"Thank you, Aria. You may have done it a little strangely, but thanks for helping. You have given me hope."

I smiled as we stepped out of the Last Homely House and down the steps to join the gathered Fellowship. "Yeah, I'm still working on the trust thing, so I'm accidentally harsh and strange sometimes, but I'm glad I could help."

Lord Elrond stepped forward, toward his children. "Be careful and return to me and your brother, ion nin." He said to Elladan and hugged him.

Elladan nodded. "I will Ada. I promise." They pulled away and Lord Elrond turned to me as Elohir and Elladan hugged.

"Good luck, child. Be safe and return my son to me."

I nodded. "I will, I promise." I let out a startled shriek when he suddenly enveloped me and pulled me close to him.

"You return as well." He whispered.

I laid my head on his chest, enjoying the warmth a little. He was the only one that could hug me like this and I won't feel uncomfortable. "I need to tell you something before we leave." I whispered. "You and Gandalf."

He pulled away and frowned at me. "What is it?" I looked past him and gestured for Gandalf to come over. He stops the quiet whispering he was doing with Aragorn and Legolas to join us.

"What is the matter, Aria?" He asked as I led them off away from the others more.

I shifted from one foot to the other. _OH MY WORD!_ Subconscious shouted suddenly and I jumped. _Just tell them already! You're driving me nuts!_ The two exchanged knowing looks when I jumped.

"Iknowthefuture!" I burst all in one really fast breath.

Lord Elrond frowned. "You can glimpse the future?"

I shake my head. "No, I actually know the future, all of it."

The two exchanged startled glances. "Who else did you tell?" Gandalf asked critically.

I put my hands on my hips, challengingly. "Who says I told anyone else?"

The two exchanged looks again. "Aria, you don't just up and confide in any of us, except Elladan on occasion." Lord Elrond said. "I feel the only way you would willingly tell either of us is if someone else convinced you to."

I sighed. "Okay, okay. It was Arwen. I wanted to make her feel better about Aragorn leaving, so I told her a little bit."

"Oh, Aria!" Lord Elrond exclaimed. "Do have any idea the consequences of what you've done?!"

I frown at him. "I didn't tell her anything except that he lives through all of this. All I said was that they would grow old and die together."

A strange look flashed across Lord Elrond's eyes and Gandalf let out a relieved sigh. "So she did do it." Lord Elrond said softly.

"It could have been worse, I guess." Gandalf said at the same time. I looked at them both. Lord Elrond looked like he needed a hug and Gandalf looked like he couldn't decide how to take this news. "So, it's not just a glimpse or two?" Gandalf asked for clarification.

I nodded. "I know all the choices that lead up to the…future…the end…of the story…I guess…" I answered Gandalf, but my eyes were on Lord Elrond. He looked like he really wanted to cry.

 _Are you gonna make him feel better…like you did Arwen?_ Negative asked.

 _I don't know how._ I said softly. _Arwen marries Aragorn and they die, and Elrond ends up going to the Gray Havens and sails to the Undying Lands with Gandalf, Galadriel, and Frodo on the last gray ship, remember?_

 _So, try anyway. Isn't that what you decided was being here was all about?_

I looked at Lord Elrond, who wasn't paying attention, and Gandalf, who was studying me. Something I noticed everybody does when I talk to my Thoughts. None of them interrupt me. They just wait for me to be done, like by some unspoken consent, they all don't try to stop me. They just want me to figure it out on my own.

"Lord Elrond," I say softly. He looked up at me.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Aria. Please, don't worry about what you know. Everything will happen how it was meant to. Also, don't tell anyone else anything else."

I giggled. "I know how it works knowing the future. That wasn't what I was going to say." I frowned again. "Lord Elrond, don't you want her to be happy?" I asked.

His frown deepened. "Of course!"

"And you know she will be, but you don't want to lose her, just like you lost everybody else." His eyes widened. I shrugged. "I don't just know the future. Lord Elrond, you still have your sons, and when you sail, you will have your wife again. Arwen will be happy with Aragorn, you know this, so let her be so."

He nodded. "I know." His voice was soft and sounded broken.

I sighed. "I'm not good at this, but I'm trying. I know you know and I don't really have anything to comfort you with because she DOES die, she chose a mortal life. But…" I cut off and turn to look at Lord Elrond's children. They're standing in a circle with Aragorn and Legolas, laughing and hugging, Baineth and Sirya were there as well. They all looked laid back but their eyes all showed the fear and sadness for what was coming. Sirya was already in tears, but playing it strong for his father and Baineth looked just as lost as the poor blind elfling. Arwen looked more at ease than the others and I blame that on myself.

"I know you are trying, Aria." The elven lord put a hand on my shoulder. "But you can't be expected to get it right, you've never even had to try before."

 _My Heart and Soul,_ Frightening spoke up hesitantly. _He still has the twins, well Elohir. And he sails before Aragorn and Arwen die, so if we're being technical, he leaves first. The twins don't even end up sailing._

I smiled. "Lord Elrond, you still have the twins. Nothing's going to happen to Elladan. We'll be back before you know it, and Arwen isn't dead yet. Have faith and be with your children while you still can."

Lord Elrond's eyes widened. "With nothing but darkness, you still managed to bring a little ray of light. You truly are an enchantress, Aria." He wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug. "I will miss you, strange one, but the Fellowship needs to get going."

Gandalf nodded and the three of us joined Aragorn, Legolas, his family, the twins, and Arwen. "Let us get a move on." The wizard said and the three that were leaving nodded. Elladan hugged his brother, sister, and father one last time, and tousled Sirya's hair. Aragorn hugged Arwen, Elohir, and Lord Elrond as well. Legolas shook Lord Elrond's and Elohir's hand and hugged Arwen, Baineth, and lastly Sirya, whispering reassurance in his ear. Gandalf nodded to them and the three rejoined the Fellowship.

"One last question, Lord Elrond." I said.

"Yes, Aria?"

"Should I tell Elladan? Not what I actually know, just that I know it?" Lord Elrond looked at me for a long time.

"Ask Gandalf, if he says yes, then I would."

I nodded. "Bye, guys." I turned to leave, but yelp as someone pulls me back into a hug.

"I'll miss you, Aria. Thanks for bringing Aragorn back and for helping me see a little light in the darkness." Arwen gave one last squeeze and allowed Elohir to take her place.

"Bring my brother back, I couldn't live without him." I nodded, then looked at Sirya.

I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him. "It's okay. He'll come back with a really amazing friend. I know I'm an enchantress." I whispered the words in his ear and he nodded.

"I'll miss you, Aria."

"Me too, Sirya. But I'll come visit you in Mirkwood someday." He nodded and pulled away, going to his mother's side. I nodded to her before turning to Lord Elrond.

"Be strong and always see the light. Good luck, child." I nodded and he hugged me again, then I was finally allowed to join the Fellowship.

Lord Elrond stepped forward, addressing the Fellowship, but everyone else present as well. "This is my last word. The Ring-bearer is setting out on the Quest of Mount Doom. On him alone is any charge laid: neither to cast away the Ring, nor to deliver it to any servant of the Enemy nor indeed to let any handle it, save the members of the Company and the Council, and only then in gravest need. The others go with him as free companions, to help him on his way. You may tarry, or come back, or turn aside into other paths, as chance allows. The further you go, the less easy will it be to withdraw; yet no oath or bond is laid on you to go further than you will. For you do not yet know the strength of your hearts, and you cannot foresee what each may meet upon the road."

I looked at Gimli as he followed the lines of the book. "Faithless is he that says farewell when the road darkens!"

"Maybe," Lord Elrond answered. "But let him not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the nightfall."

"Yet sworn word may strengthen quaking heart." I disagree. The point of the quest is to free the people of Middle Earth of Sauron's oppression forever, to swear takes away the freedom to choose and thus goes against the whole point of the quest. I let Lord Elrond say what he says in the books.

"Or break it." He looked at us all. "Look not too far ahead! But go now with good hearts! Farewell, and may the blessings of Elves and Men and all Free Folk go with you. May the stars shine upon your faces!"

Bilbo called his good-bye and demanded a full account from Frodo when we all return, Sirya also called another good-bye to his father, everyone else was quiet. I smiled sadly as we turn to leave. I can't help but feel a little afraid at what is coming, because honestly, I don't know if I can or should change anything.

 _Just get to_ _ **Lothrien**_ _, first, Aria._ Commander said softly.

 _Yeah, we all know Gandalf has to fall in order to become white. After that we can talk to Lady Galadriel and decide what to do then._ Enlightening added.

 _One step at a time, Love of Our Lives._ Sane added.

I was so busy listening to my encouraging Thoughts, I almost missed the best part about the Fellowship of the Ring movie.

"Mordor, Gandalf," Frodo asked. "Is it left or right?"

"Right." Gandalf answered and I whispered along with him.

Right indeed. Right out of the frying pan and into the fire. This was going to suck so badly.

 _But at least we get to live our favorite book of all time._ Positive said brightly.

 _Yeah, this coming from the one that was thinking about Magic Tree House while we were freaking talking with Legolas and Aragorn in Modern Day Earth._ Negative answered back sarcastically.

I chuckled softly to myself as I walked between Elladan and Legolas. Aragorn and Boromir walked ahead talking quietly.

"Something funny, Ria?" Elladan asked quietly and Legolas chuckled softly at my scowl.

"I thought all of you were just going to leave me to speak with my Thoughts in peace?" I asked.

Elladan shrugged. "That was in Rivendell. Now you need to stay on your toes, it is after all, my job to protect you."

I smiled slyly at him. "Just because I don't look like I'm paying attention, doesn't mean I'm not. There's always at least someone watching out. I wouldn't be alive if it were any other way."

 _Except—_

 _Insane, you finish that thought and so help me I will put you on Memory Duty for a month!_

Needless to say he didn't finish his thought and we walked on in relative silence.

 **I'm really sorry for taking so long. At first I was really sick for a long time, then I couldn't figure anything out and I had a rare case of writer's block, now my internet isn't working and I'll have to wait to post it. To those who review, I need help. So vote: Should Elladan and Aria go with the Fellowship after Lothrien; Should Elladan and Aria part, and only Aria goes with the Fellowship; Should they go back to Rivendell; Should they figure out what the Mirkwood elves are doing during the whole Lord of the Rings; Should they go back to Rivendell and join the Fellowship later? I'm lost and need help. Also, don't forget Elladan and Aria are going to eventually fall in love (even though their practically already there). Also I've started a new fanfic, it takes place before the Hobbit and goes from there. I've decided to name it Not Once, But Twice And A Third As Well. I'm hoping to get it up today or soon after, please take a look at it. I'm also thinking about another one called The Ringbearer, but haven't started it yet, please look at them when I get them up.**


	13. Chapter 13 Fear and Nightmares

Chapter 13 Fear and Nightmares

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien. (Sorry, forgot the disclaimer in the first chapter.)**

 **Note: I am so, so, so, so, soooooo SORRY! I haven't updated in forever! I'm not going to make any excuses, because nobody really cares. All that matters is here's the next chapter. I also feel I should say sorry about the state of my grammar and spelling. I don't have a beta right now and I don't have anywhere enough time to go back through myself (right now anyway). So please bear with it.**

 **Of course, please review.**

 **Thanks to those who have already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, and KomiXO**

So, more than anything, I'd like to brutally hurt J.R.R. Tolkien and Peter Jackson. Tolkien says they went from this place to this place. Peter Jackson shows the Fellowship walking all over this really beautiful landscape in New Zealand, spread out and no one talking, all epic and bad ass, in like two minutes. Well, neither accurately cover what it means to travel with the Fellowship.

WE'VE BEEN WALKING FOR FREAKING EVER!

Like a really, really, really looooooong time!

I'm not usually a complainer, I had a rough life and it made me tough as nails, but seriously. It was sooooooooooooooo booooooooooring!

My feet didn't hurt or anything. None of my muscles protested at the hills we climbed, the streams and rivers we crossed, or the nights sleeping on the cold ground. None of that bothered me, it was the fact that it went on forever!

I felt like I was going to go gray with how long we walked and my Thoughts were no better. All their incessant complaining. I was ready to strangle them all.

Sure there was plenty of time to get to know each other, which meant the hobbits begging stories from me and everyone else listened, even if they pretended they weren't—not mentioning any names, Boromir—convincing said unmentioned person and Gimli that I wasn't a lunatic witch, ready to kill them and dance around their graves laughing and singing like I'm a maniac—although the thought occurred with Gimli, sometimes. It also gave us—especially me—the chance to get to know the Fellowship on a personal level. But it was tedious. Give me a car any day, way faster.

Anyway, things didn't get interesting until we stopped for the evening not far from the ruins of Hollin and Gimli decided to complain about the way Gandalf had chosen. Elladan and Legolas were standing on high rocks, keeping watch, Sam was cooking food for Frodo, and Frodo and Aragorn were watching Boromir teach Merry and Pippin to use a sword. Gandalf sat not far off and Gimli—of course—started complaining.

I was half paying attention to the sword fight, but as soon as Gimli asked Gandalf to go through the Mines of Moria, he had all my attention. In the movie, Gandalf is really grave and serious, here, he just looked like a teenage boy reluctant to do what their told.

"I would not take the road to Moria unless I had no other choice."

 _Aria, the crebain of Dunland!_ Subconscious suddenly hissed.

I jumped up and ran to Elladan. "What is it, Aria?"

Before I could say anything, Sam asked, "What is that?"

Gimli and Boromir said something, but at the exact same time as Legolas shouted it, I whispered, "Crebain from Dunland!"

Elladan paused only a second to look at me before yanking me off the rocks and down underneath as the rest of the Fellowship did the same. He held me tight around the waist and shoulders, pressing me to him as we lay under the low overhang. The crebain shot over us in a massive flock of black birds, big enough to freaking eat us all in a few quick bites.

I clenched my eyes shut as they passed. I had enough nightmares, I didn't need to add giant, probably man-eating, black birds. I couldn't help but whisper, "please don't be like the book," as I pressed back tighter against Elladan.

"Av'osto." His whispered softly in my ear and held me tighter. "They'll pass."

I'm not a wimp, but those birds gave me enough freaking chills to keep me warm in the artic.

And speaking of pass…they didn't. Like in the books, we had to hide for the rest of the freaking day. They kept flying south, the way we were going, then circling back and going north. It wasn't until nightfall that they finally stopped flying over and my poor head could convince my heart that it was okay and I didn't need to have a heart attack.

"We rest here tonight, but our passage south is being watched." Gandalf snapped angrily.

I couldn't help myself from stealing his line. "Let's take the pass of Caradhras?"

He smiled at me wearily and nodded. "We shall."

Elladan helped me bed down. "Are you okay?" He asked.

I shrugged and he studied me, but honestly, I wasn't sure I wanted to tell him, I don't like confiding in people.

 _Aria._ Commander started. _Didn't you decide back in Rivendell to give this a shot?_

 _Yeah, Heart of Hearts. We aren't giving you a choice. Tell him._ Sane commanded in a sharp voice.

I sighed. "They just made me nervous, that's all." I finally answered him.

He nodded and I was surprised when he didn't say anything about my mentioning the book, or how I'd known about the Pass of Caradhras. He simply smiled at me and squeezed my hand. "Try to get some sleep, they're gone now."

I nodded and he moved away to stand guard with Legolas. But guess what happens when I have a really stressful day? Nightmares. And why would tonight be any different? It wouldn't. So I decided I didn't want to test it and went to talk to Gandalf.

I sat up at a crouch and used my hands and feet to help me creep quietly over the sleeping members of the Fellowship to Gandalf. He sat against one of the boulders, his legs crossed, hat down over his eyes, and staff laying across his lap. I hesitated. If he was asleep I didn't want to wake him, but he was a wizard. I didn't even know if he could sleep.

I risked it and gently laid a hand on his shoulder. He hand shot up and grabbed my wrist in a vice-like grip and without even thinking I snapped away, twisting my hand free and snagging his in return.

It all happened in an instant, ending with us both staring into each other's eyes, me holding his left arm away from us. My heart was pounding in my chest and I could tell by his eyes, Gandalf's was too.

"Child, had I not looked up first, I could have injured you." His voice was low and angry but also very startled.

I nodded, still shocked. "I know." I heard Elladan and Legolas both come up behind me, I also caught Gandalf's eyes in the low light of the stars as they flicked over my shoulder at them.

"I just needed to talk to you." I finally said. He nodded and pulled his arm down.

"What is it you need?" I glanced back at Legolas and Elladan. Legolas had been to Modern Day Earth, but didn't know about the Lord of the Ring's trilogy. Elladan didn't know anything other than that we were bound together in some strange way.

I looked back. "You know what I told you and Lord Elrond, right before we left?"

He nodded slowly. He probably thought I was going to try to tell him something, but—call me heartless—I wasn't going to. Not even that we're going to end up going to the Mines of Moria and he's going to die. Everything's got a purpose, especially that.

"Well, I was wonder, since…" I stopped and looked back at Elladan. "Did you tell Lord Elrond about what happened?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Only that I was now your protector."

 **Okay, I know I cut it off here and that's kind of dumb, and a terrible cliffhanger, but I need help. So, obviously I've been out of it, inspiration down the drain and creativity on a vacay with my imagination. I can't decide, should I keep the story on Aria's POV or should I switch off and have a little bit of 3rd POV with Elladan?**

 **I really hope you guys haven't abandon me, even though you probably feel like I've abandon you and Aria.**

 **Oh, and 'Av'osto' means 'Do not fear' or 'Have no fear'. Can't remember the original place I learned it, cause it was a long time ago.**


	14. Chapter 14 Cold, Fing Cold

Chapter 14 Cold, F***ing Cold

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien.**

 **Note: I am the worst person in the world! I haven't updated in almost two months! But now that I've graduated high school, I'll update every week or more, to make up for not writing. Soooooooooo Sorrry!**

 **Of course, please review (even though I don't deserve them).**

 **Thanks to everybody that already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, KomiXO**

 **LadyLindariel-I'm sorry you related to Aria so well, but at the same time, I'm glad I did her realistically (as sad as that is). Thank you for reviewing.**

 **Raider-K-Thank you for the many comments. I'm glad you liked my story so much.**

 **Emperor DeLacus-Thanks, I'm glad you like it. She will get a happy ending. *SPOILER* I'm mean, but evil. Also, totally love your profile picture.**

 **Dinopoodle-Thank you as well. I like Elrond too, and your profile picture kinda makes it obvious that he's your favorite.** **J**

I let out a tired sigh. _You are really dumb, My Heart._ Commander commented matter-of-factly as we trudged through the ever deepening snow. Well, everybody except the bloody f***ing elves…pardon the language, I let it go a little when I get uncomfortable. And the snow in Caradhras was f***ing cold! (Sorry.)

 _Yes, I am well aware._ I answer to my ever-growing-annoying companion's comment. The others were silent at the moment, I was vaugly worried they might be freezing to death somewhere in the back of my mind, but I was too damn busy trying to stay on my feet to care at the moment. (Language.)

Two nights ago, I'd changed my mind. I didn't ask Gandalf about telling Elladan. Don't get me wrong, I fully intended too, but after Elladan said what he said…I just couldn't. If he really was going to stick by me, through whatever was going to happen happened, then he'd figure it out and confront me about it, or he wouldn't. And if he didn't stick with me, then one less thing to use against me.

With his answer, _"Only that I was now your protecter,"_ it made me realize something. Don't ask me how I know, I just do, but…

We were bonded, Elladan and I. Not in a traditional elven family bond of any kind, definitely not a marriage bond, but it was a bond, an elven bond…at least I thought, or rather felt that it was.

 _Why don't you ask the Lady Galadriel when we get to Lothlòrien?_ Enlightening asked, both helpfully and a bit unnecessarily.

I let out an involuntary shiver. I've been cold no small amount of time in my life, but this beat all. _I'm not thinking about this right now!_ I told them all before any of the others could say anything. _I am absolutely too damn cold!_

The light snowfall had started as soon as we'd started into the pass and hadn't stopped. I knew it wasn't long until it turned into a full blown blizzard. F***ing Saurman, I know he wasn't the one that made it snow, but he was on Sauron's side, so he deserved a f***.

Gandalf was up front, then Gimli, the four hobbits, Boromir, and Aragorn. I was in the back with Elladan standing on top of the snow not far away. Legolas was on walking on the snow as well, up front near Gandalf.

I caught Elladan watching me. I hid my shivers and pushed on after Aragorn. My toes had lost feeling at least ten minutes ago, but I didn't care, because at that moment, Frodo slipped and rolled past both Boromir and Aragorn. I caught him and helped him up.

"You okay?"

He started to nod, but then panicked as he couldn't find the Ring. I looked up at Boromir as he slowly picked up the glittering darkness. "It is a strange fate that we should suffer so much fear and doubt over so small a thing. Such a little thing."

Aragorn and Frodo look up at his voice and everyone stops. "Boromir, give Frodo the Ring." He slowly moved his hand to the hilt of his sword.

Boromir stared at it transfixed before snapping his eyes away and chuckling lightly. "As you wish, I care not." He handed the Ring back to Frodo and ruffled his hair. I held out my hand for Frodo and he takes it. I try not to think too much about how cold it is, even compared to mine.

"Some things have to happen." I whispered. "And I'm sorry." He looked up at me with a strange look on his face and I effectively ignored the look Aragorn and Elladan exchanged. I shook my head. "You'll understand later, but…" I stopped thinking about Gandalf's fall from the movie. "But, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, now."

Frodo nodded slowly, but didn't get the chance to answer. Legolas jogged back to us. "What is wrong?"

Elladan shook his head. "Nothing. Let us catch up with the others."

I said we walked forever, and we did. Not always strung out in a one man line, but clustered, talking and sharing stories and such…Well, Gandalf was no stranger to me, and I hated, feared, and maybe hurt a little at the thought of the Fall.

 _Aria—_

 _Don't!_ I snapped interrupting Positive. _I am not going to talk about it._ We were all cold, them through me, so none of them had the energy to push me.

The blizzard caught us, but we pushed on, no one complained though, not even Gimli. None of us had the energy. Then Legolas said over the storm, "There is a fell voice on the air."

Elladan stopped beside me and listened, as Gandalf cried, "IT'S SAURMAN!" I grabbed Elladan's hand and Boromir, who was in front of me helping Merry and Pippin, pulling them back as the rocks crashed down over top of us. Elladan threw himself over me, stopping any of the debris from hitting me, and Gandalf yelled his counter spell over the wind.

Lightning struck the snow on the cliff above us and it let loose. A deafening crash pounded my ears, then silence, then, cold and dark, my two least favorite things. We lay still only a moment, before Elladan shoved out and broke to the surface, pulling me up with him. He held me in his arms for a moment, wrapping his cloak around me as Legolas burst through. The others followed, but my mind numbed a bit and the world tipped.

I heard Elladan calling to me, wrapping me tighter and rubbing my numb hands. I focused on his dark hair against the icy white. "I'm okay." I said breathlessly. "Just cold."

"Good, at least you still feel." His voice was right in my ear.

Then Gandalf's voice made my cold heart colder. "Let the Ringbearer decide."

"We cannot stay here! It will be the death of the hobbits!" Boromir cried.

I looked to Frodo and somehow he caught my eye. I nodded slowly and he looked to Gandalf. "We will go through the mines."

"So be it."

 **Again, I am soooooo! sorry! I love you guys and don't deserve reviews, but please do so anyway. I'll for sure update tomorrow, just for payment for taking so long.**


	15. Chapter 15 No Regrets, Hopefully

Chapter 15 No Regrets, Hopefully

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien.**

 **Note: Here's the other chapter because I'm such a mean bitch and didn't update for so long.**

 **Of course, please review (even though I still don't deserve them).**

 **Thanks to everybody that already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, KomiXO, LadyLindariel, Raider-K, Emperor DeLacus, Dinopoodle**

The trip down the mountain sucked about as much as the trip up. It didn't stop snowing and it was as cold as ever, but I would have stayed in that pass for a thousand years if it meant we didn't reach Moria.

But we did.

"Dwarf doors are invisible." Gimli said.

"Yes, Gimli. Their own masters cannot find them, if their secrets are forgotten!" Gandalf finally called.

Unable to stop myself, I whispered, "Why doesn't that surprise me?" the exact same time as Legolas. Elladan looked over at me, his beautiful gray eyes calculating. It wouldn't be long before he caught on and would begin to question me.

It finally began to grow warmer and the landscape changed. The land was murky and boggy with a lot of fog and humidity. It was growing dark, which added to the creepiness.

"It reads "The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria, Speak Friend and Enter"." Gandalf said pointing with his staff.

"What do you suppose that means?" I mouth as Merry asks.

Gandalf looked to him and Elladan to me. "Oh, it's quite simple. If you are a friend, you speak the password and the doors will open. Annon Edhellen, edro hi ammen!"

"Why are you speaking elvish, if it's a dwarvish door?" I asked. This question had been plaguing me since I saw the movies. It didn't make any sense. Gandalf looks confused and clears his throat, both Legolas and Elladan look very amused, Gimli, not so much.

Without answering me, Gandalf tried again. "Fennas Nogothrim, lasto beth lammen."

"Nothing's happening." Pippin stated and I smiled.

"Of course not, Pip. Gandalf doesn't know the password." The wizard looked to me and understanding dawned.

"Would you care to share with us, Aria?" He asked. His politeness sounded kind of tight, like he'd rather hit me than ask my help.

I chuckled. "It's a riddle." Turning to Frodo, "Can you figure it out?"

The cute hobbit stared up at the word and then smiled. "What's the elvish word for friend?!"

Gandalf looked at me rather pointly and I shrugged with an all too innocent smile. "What can I say, it'd be too easy just to tell you." Gandalf growled and opened his mouth to speak, but I stopped him. I looked behind me just as Merry picked up a rock and lobbed it into the water. Gandalf frowned as he threw another one. The attention turned from me to the water as Aragorn warned the hobbits off and it began to ripple. I knelt beside Frodo. "I must say it again. I cannot change things. Even with what I know, I should not."

He frowned looking worried. "I don't understand."

"I know, but you will soon." I caught Elladan and Legolas exchange glances from the corner of my eye, but my tears made the exchange watery. Frodo, catching my withheld tears, leaned forward and hugged me. I realized that hugging and physical contact was a big comforting thing for most people.

I rose and to the dwarf door said, "Mellon." A crack appeared down the center and with great creaking and groaning, swung open ending with a boom.

 _Aria, I'm a little scared._ Insane said.

 _Yeah, so am I._

 **Here's payment for being a terrible author and not giving you chapters sooner. I hope you guys like it, I know the Thoughts haven't been very active lately, but be patient, there's a reason for that.**


	16. Chapter 16 The Mines

Chapter 16 The Mines

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien.**

 **Note:**

 **Please review**

 **Thanks to everybody that already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, KomiXO, LadyLindariel, Raider-K, Emperor DeLacus, Dinopoodle**

"Soon, Master Elf, you will enjoy the fabled hospitality of the dwarves." Gimli ranted on as we entered the darkness. I stumbled a little, but didn't look down, because believe it or not, I didn't actually want to see a dwarf skeleton.

Elladan caught my arm. "Be careful," he whispered.

"What are you talking about, I tripped on purpose." I couldn't see his face but he was probably glaring at me in the dark.

"A Mine!" Gimli's voice echoed.

"This is no mine, it's a tomb." Boromir corrected as Gandalf's light chased away the shadows revealing dozens of cob-webbed skeletons. I instinctively turned away, like I said earlier, I had no desire to see dwarf skeletons. Someone wrapped an arm around my shoulders, Elladan I assumed and Gimli began to holler.

"Goblins." I whispered to Elladan just as Legolas said it louder and the others drew their weapons. I opened my eyes and looked up at the elf, who was staring at me uncertainly.

Boromir began to cry, "Get out! Get out!" but I shook my head.

 _I can't stay out of it, guys._ Despite being unnerved by the lack of an answer I still took matters into my own hands. "Don't!" I cried jumping forward and grabbing Frodo just as the lake monster reached for his ankle.

More tentacles flew out of the water but in an act of dominoes, I shoved the hobbits down so the slimy appendages snapped over our heads. Legolas began firing arrows at it as Boromir and Aragorn pulled the hobbits back. Elladan pulled me up and grabbing Legolas' arm we ran back into the mines as the creature lunged out of the water.

The doors crumbled onto the creature as we ran into the darkness, not in as much of a hurry as we would be in, had I not intervened. After the rumbling avalanche had stopped and all was pitch black, Gandalf lit up his staff.

"Now we have but one choice, we must face the long dark of Moria." He began to trudge forward with a dark look on his face. "Be on your guard, there are older and fowler things than orcs in the deep places of the world."

Slowly the Fellowship began to follow him as he moved deeper into the darkness, each exchanging looks with each other.

"Quietly now, it's a four days journey to the other side," Gandalf whispered, "Let us hope that our presence may go unnoticed."

I took a deep breath as my stomach tightened in anticipation and dread. Not only did I know that it wouldn't, I also couldn't shake the really gloomy and depressing feeling of doom that was settling over me.

 _Guys, why are you so quiet?_ I whispered to my Thoughts. They hadn't said a word since Caradhras, except Insane's fear, I was getting a little worried.

 _Your memories are getting harder to contain._ Commander answered softly. _We are working to keep them back._

Her answer was so simple and undetailed…it spiked my worry even more. I didn't feel my dark memories, but perhaps it was because they were working so hard and quietly. Still, I could not shake the sense that my Thoughts were hiding something from me and this scared me more than a thousand goblins in Moria ever could.

 **Here's the next chapter. I know I'm going a little slow, and there isn't much AU, but there will be later. I hope I can do the battles justice.**


	17. Chapter 17 Chapter 0

I'm sorry it's taking so long. I also sorry if you got excited about this being a chapter but it's not. I don't have a computer right now and the wifi is acting very strange. I'll update as soon as I can and I hope you guys are still out there to read this.


	18. Chapter 17 Giving Fuel to the Flame of H

Chapter 17 Giving Fuel to the Flame of Hope

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters aside from my OC, Aria, the others belong to J.R.R. Tolkien.**

 **Note: Please, please, please forgive me. I was having such a hard time before, writer's block and everything, but then terrible, horrible, no good, very bad, me forgot to update again. I don't deserve your reviews (but please do anyway). Also, being as I don't have the movies to reference off, but I did get the books for my birthday, I will be using them as references more than before and maybe more than the movies, for the moment.**

 **Thanks to everybody that already reviewed.**

 **. .ra, SolitaryPeak, Mirkwood Warrior, Celridel, sweetdixie.17, KEZZ 1, KomiXO, LadyLindariel, Raider-K, Emperor DeLacus, Dinopoodle, and**

 **The Lupine Sojourner: Thank you. You're review may have been short but it was sweet and I loved it. It made me all warm and tingly inside.** **;)**

We traveled the length of Moria for four days and it is necessary to say, it sucked…bad! Nobody got any sleep at night because we were all as tense as cats in a dog pound and jumping at any and every shadow.

On our fourth day in the dark stink of the rather impressive but ruined dwarven stronghold, we encountered an arch that split three ways. They all headed east—the direction we were going—but in a characteristically pleasing, yet irritating way, the left tunnel went down, the right went up, and the middle on went straight and annoyingly narrow. Gandalf looked rather irritated and muttered, "I have no memory of this place."

I let out a sigh and flop down on the ground. "This is gonna take a while," I muttered to Elladan, "You might want to make yourself comfortable."

He shot me a questioning look, but I ignored it. _Guys…Commander, are you okay?_ I waited a moment, but there wasn't an answer. "Keep an eye out for me." I said to Elladan, who still stood where he'd stopped when we'd stopped. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, slipping deeper into my mind. _Commander?_

 _Aria!_ Insane suddenly answered. _You shouldn't be this deep. You know the Balrog is coming and you don't know how it, or the fight with goblins will affect you._

I frowned at him. _I wouldn't be this deep, Insane, if you guys would answer when I call. What's going on? Where's Commander? Why are all of you so deep in? It's making me nervous and more than a little worried._

 _I'm sorry, Aria. We're just worried about the Balrog and if the ring will try to influence you and we really hope you can manage against the goblins and cave troll._

I studied the undefined form of my companion. _Alright. Will you come back when we get to Lothlórien?_ Insane nodded. I couldn't shake the feeling that he was leaving something out, but I pushed the thought away. Without saying another word to him, I pushed out of the deep end and opened my eyes.

Elladan nodded to me and I nodded back. Everyone had settled down, with Gandalf removed from the rest of us, facing the tunnels, probably deep in thought. "Any change?" I asked softly, nodding toward Gandalf. Elladan shook his head and I sighed.

I leaned my head against the stone wall, ignoring any dirt or slime on it, promising myself I'd give myself a thorough washing when I got to Lothlórien. I watched Frodo, set aside from the rest of the Fellowship, with Sam trying to feed him.

Sam moved away, leaving Frodo by himself. He sat silently for a moment before suddenly looking behind him. He looked around at the Fellowship, then at Gandalf, then behind him again. I smiled and go to my feet.

"I'm going over to sit with Frodo." I murmured to Elladan, before doing just that.

"Hey." I say softly, sitting.

He looks up at me, then behind him. "There's something out there." He whispered.

"It's Gollum." I answered.

"Gollum?" He asked.

"He's been following us for three days."

"He escaped the dungeons of Barad-Dûr!"

I nodded. "Or let loose. And now the Ring had drawn him here. He will never be rid of his need for it. He hates and loves the Ring, as he hates and loves himself." I tried not to say it as cryptically as Gandalf would have, but what's not cryptic about talking about Gollum.

Frodo looked back at him. "Sméagol's life is a sad story." I quoted to him. "Before the Ring found him…before it drove him mad."

"It's a pity Bilbo didn't kill him when he had the chance!" Frodo said softly.

I smiled at him. "It was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand. Many that live deserve death, and some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo?" He looked down. "Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment, Frodo. Even the very wise cannot see all ends. Gollum has some part to play yet, for good or ill, before this is all over." We both looked back simultaneously as Gollum made the weird noise with his throat and pulled back into the darkness. "The pity of Bilbo may rule the fate of many." I quoted, again.

Frodo was silent for a moment. I glanced across the way to Elladan. He was watching us, his beautiful gray eyes not cold, but calculating, like he was catching the hints I was throwing his way, but hadn't quite found the answer. Noticing me watching him, he nodded elegantly. I couldn't help but note how beautiful he was. Legolas was gorgeous too, they were both elves, but for some reason, I found Elladan even more so. I thought of Hollin, when the crebain passed, with me pressed against Elladan and his arm wrapped around my waist and for reasons beyond my comprehension I blushed.

"I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened." Frodo suddenly said, drawing me back to the task at hand.

I wrap my arms around his shoulders and hug him. "I know. Many go through troubling and burdensome times and wish they hadn't happened, but it isn't for us to decide. 'All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.'" I quoted. "The world isn't full of just bad, Frodo, there's good out there too." I smiled at him as he wrapped his arms around my waist, completing the hug. I wasn't one for physical contact, obviously, though vastly more willing than my Thoughts, but Frodo was going to have a tough time of it before the story was through and he'd need all the comfort and hugs he could get.

"Your cousin was meant to find the Ring, you know." I continued softly. "Which means, you too were meant to inherit it from him. And that is an encouraging thought, because it means that the good forces out there know that you are strong enough. And you are, Frodo Baggins, you and Sam. Together, you two can do anything you put your minds to."

Frodo looked up at me. "Sam?"

I nodded. "Yes, Sam. He cares for you, Frodo and will go to the ends of the Earth and more, for you. And you'll do well to remember that. When in doubt, always trust Samwise Gamgee. There's no stronger soul, nor greater heart, than the one found in that curly-haired, blonde hobbit."

Frodo smiled, looking over to Sam. "Yes, Sam is a good friend. I'm glad he decided to come, if not sad that he has to go through this as well."

I gave Frodo one last squeeze. "Don't be. The willingness and love of friends is what keeps this world light, even when it's darkest. Have faith and hope and you shall prevail."

Frodo smiled and stood as I did. "Thank you, Lady Aria. You are very wise."

"I'm glad I could make you feel better, Frodo. You carry the weight of all the world on your shoulders. It is the duty of the Fellowship to make it lighter and though I may not technically be part of the Fellowship, I am now part of this world and I would see it survive." I smiled and ruffled his dark curls. "Besides, I know pain and I do not wish it upon you, Frodo. You are too good and kind."

I made my way back to Elladan just as Gandalf rose with delight. "Oh! It is this way!"

"He's remembered!" Merry cried jovially.

Gandalf chuckled, putting on his hat. "No, but the air does not smell so foul down there. And when in doubt, Meriadoc, follow your nose."

Elladan falls into step beside me as we continue onward. "What was that all about?" He asks, gesturing back to Frodo, who is looking infinitely more at ease than he'd been through the whole journey.

I threw him a mischievous grin. "Just fueling the fires of hope." I answered, then frowned. "The weight of the world and this war rests on the shoulders of those two hobbits."

Elladan looked back at Frodo, who was talking to Sam happily. "Both?" He asked surprised.

I nodded. "Sam will play his part before the end and it will be a deal bigger than most will think or know."

He was silent for a moment. "Yes." He finally said. "Burdens are always easier when they are held by two shoulders, rather than one."

"You miss Elohir, don't you?" I asked, finding it odd that I've suddenly become the therapist for the whole Fellowship. Next thing I know Boromir will be telling me his ring troubles, Aragorn his Awren troubles, and Gimli and Legolas their dwarf-elf rivalry troubles.

 _Don't forget Gandalf's Balrog troubles and Merry's and Pippin's food troubles._ Insane suddenly put in. I refrained from actually jumping, but that didn't stop me from wanting to punch him.

 _I thought you guys were busy? What's the big idea of suddenly talking and scaring the crap out of me?_

Insane shrugged. _We decided it would probably be best not to leave you entirely alone and I just didn't have anything to say sooner._

"Yes." Elladan suddenly answered, throwing me off.

Gathering my thoughts from the conversation I was having, I answered. "Of course, now that I think about it, it was a rather stupid question. You're twins, of course you miss him." Elladan nodded, the smallest glimmer of mischief finding its way to the surface of his fathomless eyes. I chuckled. "Tell me about you two, then." I said softly. "We have spoken little on the trip."

He shrugged. "What is there to tell?"

I cocked an eyebrow at him. "Are you serious? You're what, three thousand years old, and there's nothing to tell?"

He smiled at me and for the first time it reached his eyes, sending meaningless butterflies up and down my spine. "Very well. There is much to tell. However, it will not be done here. Here is not the place."

I sighed with a shrug. "Whatever. You're the one that apparently doesn't have a life, so I didn't think it mattered."

I heard the softest chuckle from the back of the group, where Legolas walked near Aragorn. I shot Elladan a smirk. "Sounds like someone's laughing at you."

Elladan simply shook his head, though his smile was still there, just beneath the surface.

 **Well, it looks like my big ass writer's block is gone, because that got long, fast. I hope you enjoyed and I promise I'll update sooner. I was hoping to get to Balin's grave, but decided giving both Frodo and Elladan a little therapeutic talk would be better.**


	19. Chapter 19 Warning Please Read

I wanted to post this to warn all my readers:

I am going back through and rewriting and editing the beginning chapters of A Penny for Your Thoughts. I'm going to do the beginning a bit different and so, won't be posting any new chapters. I'm also going to take the whole story down and repost it as soon as I have the first chapters redone.

I wanted to let you all know and hope you will reread my story when I repost it. It will be under the same title and I'll send out one more warning right before I take the story down.

I want to thank you all for reading and reviewing and hope to hear from you again in the redo.

-MaNY1001


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